Let me start, by saying I’m very sorry to anyone who was offended by my actions, or my trolling. It will become apparent what I’m talking about soon, but the purpose of this whole post is to explain why I did it, and why I’ve been post dumping like crazy lately.
So, as many of you know by the giant posts on my drug habbits, and the essays I write on sorcery, apparently I like to do a lot of dumb and stupid shit .
Basically this is a long story about what I’ve been trying to do with all these long posts, and my latest incredibly stupid and intoxicated forum escapades with none other than the “666” himself “Master Jeshua” Aka “Black Jezus”.
I made some posts about Azazel, and this is a mysterious subject, and already picked up a little heat in the initial process, where I literally went out to talk about Azazel and shared my experiences publicly that I have shared with few if any.
Now, I don’t like to seem like a showboat, and many of these experiences happened over a year ago in some cases, or over the last year. I also, was afraid, of a troll saying some retarded thing here, and seeing if my “enemies” here would take sides with him. Then, I realized how paranoid that was, because all the most reputable and powerful people are my friends here anyway.
What I realized is, BALG is too smart to accept “Master Yeshua 666” as a troll. You also had some pretty good reasons you guys listed that this guy was a troll faggot, which let me know my giant ass posts weren’t basically me talking to a wall. <<<THIS IS ONE OF THE MOST MAJOR REASONS I EVEN MADE THAT POST. I love this place, and I wanted to have discussion around my posts which was completely absent. I was also incredibly high and I reflected on this retarded life experience in a hindu facebook group had this where “we all learned from my trolling” so I wanted to prove something really retarded to everyone. Looks like I have made success, no?
I went out, and made a post called “evocation by gesture” in the mastering omnipotence section, and dedicated it to the first post of the guy who gave an intelligent response to every point the troll made. I felt like this was at least some way of saying I really was sorry for the bullshit troll post. Part of the reason I put that there was to teach. And, I wanted to look a little more modest about posting more information. All of this stuff happened on accident, and spirit wants me to show this stuff to a lot of you people. I also, don’t want to look like a giant douche bag. However, I think I’ve really done the opposite of that, and many of you may agree.
But BALG does not deserve a troll, so if he comes on again, he will serve a higher purpose perhaps.
I don’t want to make myself look like the ultimate expert of Azazel, I’m just a crazy guy, who used a lot of drugs, did a lot of magick, went completely insane, and did a whole bunch of dumb shit, and I’m repeating some of it so you never have to. I’m also trying to share something I think is incredibly important, for free, with people who are deeply trying to quest for Azazel. I’m sorry if my “How 2 B Godz!” post that was in the white magick section was strange. And I’m normally a very private person who is trying to break with a lot of traditions and the past as part of my spiritual journey. And it looked like, as usual, nobody else would add to the discussion, so I tried to do something to keep the thread from dying before I gave out a lot of useful information. Sorry, I felt like I had to invent someone to cause fake drama so my post would be discussed. This was dumb on my part, but I wanted to make sure I wasn’t just posting to a wall like usual. I can see now, that is not needed.
I get a lot of people sending me messages and posting in response to my claims, saying “I was really thinking this over…I was just thinking about this…This has to do with exactly what’s going on in my life right now” Well, exactly, Azazel doesn’t have a facebook account, but he knows you login here, and he and a few others help me write these posts, so no surprise that they match your journey and timing being excellent. I was lost on much of the meaning of what happened to me until I sat and reflected upon it with their aid. They are some of my best teachers, who take no credit for anything they really show me as they are content to let me believe I did it all so I can become a god. They are content to let you read it here because they know you look for it here, and they want you to become god too, and told me to post it for you.
It’s very nice you feel that way, but please try to add to the discussion even to verify my claims in the smallest of manner, so I seem like less of a giant bullshitting troll on this forum, dumping giant threads all the time.
The power of spirits is an eternal thing, the likes of which many people of this age no longer remember. But for those that do, pipe in a little more please, your wisdom is necessary for this place’s survival, and that is something many of you need to hear.
I also, had to come out at the end of “how 2 b godz!” and thank Defectron once again, because I have given an ultra late review on his services, because I was too crazy and paranoid to let him or any of my friends ever speak of all this shit until right now. I took him posting in that thread, as a convenient way to repay that favor that was truly owed for a long time. I hope he doesn’t get pissed off I poised my own review thread with my own trolling. I’m well aware this is not good marketing, and I’m sorry once again to him. Hopefully he can have this picture of a pony, and post one covered in poo if he accepts my apology. This place is weird, just accept it.
The types of incidents I’m talking about are the reason I’m post dumping a ton all over BALG a good portion of the time. But I might not be able to do this for much longer, and I think I’ve given you an incredible amount. That, and I don’t feel like all of you have an incredible need for it. And I’ve proven everything I needed to and said everything I really needed to say. I’m no longer anywhere near as insane, and I can clearly see the best thing to do with much of this information is to share it. If you have to ask why, the cost of a lot of it to me and my soul was so great, I felt like I had to at least share that with my friends here who WANT this information and ARE ABLE to use it to better their lives and magical workings…I really want to give this away for free, because I believe it can help you realize your purpose, as much as it has helped me realize my own.
As you can tell by the type of posts I’ve made and the time I’m spending on them, I’m trying to generate real discussion about the magick we use from a place of our own experience, because I have found that to be incredibly helpful in my own gnosis. I don’t know how much more time I can really dedicate to BALG, but I had an opening in my life, and a lot to share with people I cared about. Many of you have helped me out, given good advice, magick, and healing when it was needed on multiple occasions.
I’m sorry I’m so fucking insane, bat shit crazy, and fucked up in the head enough that I made this fucking stupid troll, to talk shit at my own posts, and I know how retarded this whole situation is. I don’t need to make “Master Yeshua” to teach anyone, and I’m sorry I made that insulting post under his name, and I hope nobody got too offended by me trying to troll myself.
Once again, I’m very sorry about everything I did, and I know how this must sound like I got a hold of some “really good shit” sometimes. And to be honest, that’s not entirely wrong either. I’m not trying to be mister expert here, or mister take me serious, and that’s part of what this post is about. I literally am trying to let you know I trolled myself, and got into crying laughter when I was high.
I’m just a crazy black magician, and sometimes we do things like this.
I hope it at least made you laugh as hard as I did.
TL;DR: I am Master Yeshua,
Back to the Great Work,
-Frater Apotheosis
