Shocking revelations, panic, and a questioning of everything i thought i knew

ive been doing magick since i was in 6th grade been obsessed with it i didnt get into the lhp and Spiritual Satanism until i was in 10th grade back in 2010. i remember i was reading the joy of Satan website and it was like i was awakened to something like i found something that really resonated with me. i knew nothing about the left hand path but i delved into it through this site. i put my complete trust into them cause the evidence they put forth was very convincing and they cited alll there sources. but my biggest mistake was that i took things at face value and didnt do my own research much into what they were sayiong about things.

it was like i was admiring them so much that there words seemed divine almost. i will never make that mistake again. now besides the energy work and meditations the stuff they were teaching was far out there but i couldnt see this at the time. all the way up until october of 2019. I was feeling out of resonance and lost i was struggling hard. i started watching ea koetting videos and michael hysons videos and it was like i woke up again. i talked to michael hyson and he was like never take things at face value always do your own research on things. so i did i found out so much stuff on my own and saw through things then i just ended up cutting all ties to the joy of Satan.

my life was changing for the better. all this information started coming in new revelations and at times it just seemed like it was too much. I found the Cabal system of magick and it was so powerful and potent unlike anything i ever seen. then i took a video course from E.A. Koetting called black magick I liked it alot it felt real and true even recently when i just bought the mastering courses and haitian voudoun course it worked perfectly almost. what i mean is i bought it cause i struggling with clear comunnication with spirits and demons. when i talked to them i didnt always hear them clearly and when i did there was this fear that i was just talking to myself. i mean i never doubted if they were real cause i knew they were and i never doubted that they came or was there with me cause i felt them and their energy i was always sensitive to energy but i just didnt trust my senses. well from the mastering divination videos i saw i did the excercises and they worked the first time i did them. then i thought how can this be cause i was taught that it would not work the first time you did it that you would have to build up to it and then i thoght it had to be all those years of energy and charka work i did i was not new to magick.

So i learned to trust my senses. and it feels great i spent the whole day practicing spirit comunication and scrying and divination. i really want to get good at it as something i really love and was obsessed with was necromancy and good communication is a part of it. so now all these questions is popping up like for example do Demons and spirits have a true appearance or do they choose different appearances depending on the individual? another example I had a dream about Baal not too long ago and he said he wanted to work with me his skin was pure black, razor sharp teeth with tribal markings on his face and hes in some type of armor i have not seen. now he didnt look like what the goetia said he looked like or what the joy of Satan said he looked like. and he appears like that every time i think about him or what i see when hes around. so im curoius.

I feel like im progress more and more each day and i dont feel lost anymore just a little overwhelmed by all the information and knowlegde im getting. im so glad i found you guys and that i bought these courses they so very helpful. thank you.


Spirits tend to appear however the operator receives them. It would seem odd to notice a face you’ve never seen before but somewhere in your mind you recognize them as “(spirit)” does this make sense

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Yeah you’re fine.

Some advice I realised, the demons give us their power and show us how to cultivate our own power, but it’s up to you what you’re going to do with it.

So you should focus on wellness and self-development as well.

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