Shinri Enochian Journal

Good job , keep up the good work

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I hadnā€™t thought of the buds in that way before, very cool. The image of planting seeds that, when cultivated, grow and blossom into the desired results was given to me early on in my work with the magick, but I never drew that connection, very interesting.

To be honest Iā€™m still wrapping my mind around the idea of the True Self/Will. Iā€™ve meditated on this concept a decent amount, and there are still many mysteries. A couple years back when I was going deep with the archangels I wrote the following if youā€™re curious (Iā€™m cringing at myself btw, my writing was pretty shit, not that it isnā€™t shit now) (Iā€™ll be back for your other ideas):

"In some ways, you can consider your self to be like a pool of water. At the moment of your birth, there was but a small puddle, though it was clear and free of debris. As you grow, so too does the pool widen and deepen, but along the way, things outside of you find their way within the pool.

When you first discover magick, there are likely many leaves, sticks, and perhaps even cans and other trash floating on the surface of the pool. By fulfilling your initial desires, you begin to clear away these things, and more and more of the water beneath them is exposed. Upon seeing this water again, however, you may find that it has grown murky, and that things within the water prevent you from seeing through to the bottom. To clear away these impurities, however, you will likely need the help of spirits other than the angels.

As you clear away more of the distractions above, and uncover what is below, a sense of clarity will begin to emerge. The Light illuminates the water from above, and the Shadow contains the water within the pool. It could be said that True Will comes from the union and alignment of these two aspects of your self, and indeed there is much truth to this."

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I like this imagery. It reminds me of the Buddhist concept of the inner Buddha. Itā€™s another explanation of the True Self. It is as you described. You realize through meditation that there are impurities and litter within the pool of the Self.

The only limit to this analogy in reference to the inner Buddha or True Self is that this is actually a purity that can not be diluted. So, it would be like realizing that all the litter and murkiness is not a part of the pool of the Self. It is illusionary perception made due to the perception from the illusory self.

There is no need to clear the things polluting the water, because they are actually projections and illusions. They are discarded as one draws closer to the pool. Finally, the pool is reached when a clear reflection is found. This reflection turns out to not be a reflection at all. It is the manifestation of the pool. Our physical incarnation is really a manifestation of our True Self. And we can, through hard work and meditation, come to percieve from this vantage point. At that level, we can make our vessel be whatever we wish, and control our lives in ways not possible when we were plagued by illusions.

The Light, Darkness, and Shadow, do not exist within the pool of Self. This is my own gnosis and practice. Nothingness, Ain Sof, has no concept of light and dark. That duality exists within creation and experience as a created being. When we experience the True Self, we find that the darkness is just what we are not able to perceive. We do not perceive the ā€œAin Sof Orā€, the limitless light, for what it is, and mistake it for darkness. In truth, there is no darkness or light as we imagine it. It is pure essence of Being in a realm where all has its existence. It is beyond creation, yet not beyond consciousness. It is the Pure Reality in which the True Self resides.

Darkness and light are tools of expression, not aspects of the Self. They become aspects of the illusory self because it identifies with creation and sees itself as a part of creation. The Self does not subscribe to this illusion and sees that all darkness and light come from the limitless light beyond created beingā€™s perception.

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To be honest Iā€™m not very familiar with Kabbalistic theory beyond an article or two I read on wikipedia, so I canā€™t really speak well in such terms. I also have grown to dislike terms like ā€œtrue selfā€ and ā€œillusory selfā€ because they are used in either an extremely vague or frankly incorrect way.

I must also ask that we conclude this discussion here. This is all well and interesting, but I donā€™t want my public journal becoming too cluttered. My understanding of these more mystical subjects has also changed quite significantly from my work with Lucifer, and it has continued to change even in these early days of the Enochian working, so I expect that by the time the work is complete my understanding will have evolved quite significantly once again.

My intention with this ā€œjournalā€ is to share some of what is revealed to me by the angels and to provide a theoretical base for those not familiar with things like Kabbalah or Buddhism that is more-or-less universally understandable, given contemplation (and, letā€™s be honest, to provide entertainment). My thoughts on these mystical matters are more-or-less completely based off of what has been revealed to me directly by the spirits anyways, so it would be fraudulent of me to claim to be an expert in any of these traditions.

Going forward I will continue in a similar manner to my previous posts, with a mixture of philosophical musings and recounts of my experiences working the magick. There are already many revelations and visions that I could share now, but I do not want people to become discouraged and think that their magick is not working just because they have not yet become open to these experiences. I also quite enjoy writing in ā€œmystic speak,ā€ with many layers of implication, but this can take more work than other, simpler writing, and so I will space things out, as you may have done so already.

To conclude this post with something actually potentially interesting, the following passage was given to me verbatim in ritual by the Shem angel Haaiah some time ago:

ā€œThink of the universe like a box. You can put things in and take things out, but the box always remains. You are the box, though you cannot be destroyed. You are also that which puts into and takes out of the box. There are other boxes near you, and sometimes your contents are also put into theirs, and what is taken out of yours is also removed from the boxes near you. You are the only true box within yourself. Only you hold up the foundations that create your reality. All things exist inside of you, yet there are many more boxes within. These boxes think that they are the one true box, but they are deceived and blinded by their own lack of power. Take pity on them, for they do not realize how truly weak and lacking in majesty that they areā€¦ā€

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Fuck me this magick can hit like a fucking truck.

I guess this is what I get for speaking the Keys.

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Are you using the Keys separate from the rituals in the Success Magick book?

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Following this journal. <3

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I speak the Key associated with each ritual prior to speaking the divine and angel names, after gazing into and scanning the sigil, which I re-create by hand (I sing and imagine the lightning strike with the angel names). The descriptions of each ritual give the associated Key, but they just go in order starting with ritual 2, and once you reach the Aethyrs the Key is the same except for the name of the Aethyr. I also read the English translation of the Key prior to the normal contemplation with each ritual. Iā€™m using the link here, which has been working well, but I do want to double-check that this is an accurate source.

Iā€™m not concerned about you, but for anyone else reading who may be new to magick, the Keys seem to make the experience much more intense. In the first rituals with the previous two Keys the energy was very strong, and as I was preparing I could feel an apprehension within me. Something deep within my mind knew that my being would be rearranged and transformed, and this brought some initial resistance. I believe this is what Blackthorne was referring to in the FAQ when he says that other methods are more like ā€œextreme introspective prayers, like trials of the soul.ā€ Such results have already been healing but quite challenging to work through, and today the angels told me that this is just the preparation for what will come with the Aethyrs. I can see how a solid grounding in mundane reality will be essential.

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I wonder if I should incorporate the Keys when I get to Ritual 2?

I was going to start travelling the Aethyrs, but now that Iā€™ve restarted Success Magick, I might follow your lead and incorporate the Keys into it.

I like the lightning technique, and find it quite interesting that youā€™ve applied it to the Enochian angels. Iā€™ve always seen the Enochian angels as a bit more aloof compared to the usual archangels so Iā€™m curious as to whether it does help with connection like with the ā€œregularā€ angels.

You have incorporated many of the other GOM techniques, like Light From The Darkness, as well. I am very intrigued and look forward to reading more.

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I wasnā€™t sure whether or not to include the Keys so I held the question in my mind during the week of ritual 1. I was leaning towards doing so, and when ritual 2 rolled around I still felt like it so I went ahead.

Iā€™m no Enochian expert, but it seems like the first set of rituals helps you get to a state of mind where you can make the most of the power of each Aethyr. The whole pathworking is designed to affect your material life, but these first rituals seem even more ā€œmaterially-orientedā€ than the later ones (which makes sense, they are the Heavens after all).

The singing and the chanting has either been very calming or very energizing, either way it makes for a very enjoyable ritual experience. I saw in your journal that you have meditated on solfeggio frequencies by the way, so if you can sing So-Do (a perfect 4th) (key doesnā€™t matter) Iā€™ve found that interval to be effective. The archangel names come out a little differently though when I do the banishing. I think I often end on La (the 6th, or the 13th if you can hear extended harmonies). If you arenā€™t musically trained but have access to a piano, it is worth taking the time to practice singing a little. The angels even asked me to stop smoking in the past so it wouldnā€™t hurt my singing voice.

As for the LftD technique, Iā€™ll leave you with this quote from the show Billions:

ā€œIā€™ve heard it said that every life is like a body of water, with an equal amount of salt added. The key to enduring it is to expand your body, to make your body so vast inside that you donā€™t even notice the salt. I say, who the fuck has time for that. I just decided to like the salt. However you get there, right?ā€

Personally, I prefer to both be vast and to like the salt.

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Thanks. I appreciate the advice. I prefer to vibrate angel names, rather than sing them, though sometimes they naturally come out sing-song anyway lol

I look forward to exploring this book more.

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Confidence

I have come to accept that I am indeed very, very sagittarius. There is perhaps nothing that I love more than the sense of adventure. I love to learn and to discover. Nothing makes me feel so terrible as a sense of stagnation and stale repetition, and nothing makes me feel so alive as venturing into the unknown.

There is just so much that I want to do with my life, so much so that I have spent a good deal of time fretting over what to do about it. I want my life to be a story with so many plot twists that no one could see ever see coming, let alone me. I want to explore the world, to have my own thriving business pursuits, to create art, to become highly skilled in martial arts and games, to explore my sexuality, and to experience the many and endless wonders of magick.

The idea of such a big life seemed impossible to me. I bought into the cynical, victimizing views of the people around me. Life does not have to be a struggle, filled with pain, hardship, and lack. I can see this now. Even in the darkest moments, there is always a thread that leads into the light.

ā€“

The following is taken directly from my private journal:

I moved my towel to my bed, and when I looked into it, I saw visions. There was a face, small at first, but then it grew larger, and then faded, and then shifted into a view of a crowd of beings, gathered in a place that seemed to have knowledge.

I hear birdsong.

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This weekā€™s post isnā€™t ready yet, and I donā€™t want to half-ass it, so expect it soon. If you care enough to notice itā€™s absence, thanks for giving a shit.

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Desire

Earlier this week, I had a dream where I was sitting atop a tower that rose high above a city below. The top of the structure was a flat circle, and atop this was a rectangular cube (a cuboid, if you will, had to google that one) made of glass, and within it, a huge and dead beast of the sea. I sat with my legs dangling over the edge of the circle, and a crony of mine crouched atop the glass.

A gust of wind shattered the glass, and the crony, who was now me, fell from the tower. In my shock I felt nothing, and as I looked to the man above I saw a face stained with pity. My only thought was that I was not ready to die.

I fell, my back towards the ground, looking up at the sky and the top of the tower as it flew further and further away. My vision began to narrow, constricting, and as the world faded from view all I could do was wait for the final sickening crunch and splattering of bone and blood before it all went dark. But the impact never came, only the darkness. For a moment all was silent, but then I realized that I was still aware of my being, and in that being of nothingness I knew that if I spoke, there would be Light.

ā€“

A number of revelations regarding both this magick and myself have come to me. I have been re-reading John Dee and the Empire of Angels, and my attention was brought to the images used by the Golden Dawn. It is clear to me that the members of this organization were using faulty and confused ideas. I do not know the full depth of their corruption of this magick, but having now worked with each Watchtower, it is quite clear to me that the elemental attributions used by the Golden Dawn are inaccurate. They assign Water to the West, which is correct, but they attribute Fire to the North, Air to the East, and Earth to the South. Perhaps I am wrong and will discover this as I proceed, but it seems to me that Earth relates to the North, Fire to the East, and Air to the South. I do not think this just because these are the correspondences used in a book by the same author, but because the powers I have experienced with each Watchtower have felt associated with this arrangement of the elements, and this was accompanied by synchronicities that confirmed this. I could understand if they assigned Fire to the South and Air to the East, as those are the correspondences of the LBRP, which I also believe are incorrect, but how they arrived at these correspondences for the Watchtowers I really do not know.

I have also been re-reading Success Magick itself, and re-discovered a passage which helped clarify why the magick has been presented in this way. The Keys are said to be largely connected to the Loagaeth tables, and to open a connection to angelic forces which are described as being potentially impractical for work that relates to the material world. However, they are also associated with particular Divine Names and angels encoded within the Watchtowers, which bring powers that are more ā€œpracticalā€ in nature. My interpretation of this, given also that the author states that speaking the Keys is a worthwhile endeavour, is that speaking the Keys alone will connect one to Heavenly powers that are not connected with the Material world, but are more abstract, and that this system, as it is presented, is designed to empower the angels of The Great Table of the Earth by connecting them to the Loagaeth powers, which seem to underlie the powers of The Great Table of the Earth, but to do so in such a way that this connection is kept to a minimum. By adding in the Keys to the system as it is literally presented, it seems that these Heavenly and mystical experiences are unlocked in such a way that the material powers associated with them will still be expressed. By combining the Keys with the Watchtowers in this fashion, a blend is created such that the full breadth of the Heavenly powers are accessed and brought down to the Earth. This is not the first time the Gallery authors have presented only a fragment of the magick via literal instructions and have expected the student to piece together the rest from the totality of the material that they have passed on, and so given this, and, more importantly, my experience working with the magick thus far, I am confident in the way that I have chosen to proceed.

Along these lines, I have been considering to what extent I should share the experiences that I have with this magick. My concern is not so much that sharing this information could somehow cost me in the future, but that sharing too much could impede upon othersā€™ ability to experience the magick for themselves. In considering this, my thoughts returned to why I started this journal in the first place. It is my wish to share this magick with all who find their way to it through me, and so holding back would not align with this wish. I was also reminded that reading about mysticism is only ever a way to open oneā€™s mind to receiving true understanding, and that nothing I ever say could somehow ruin this process, and may indeed be what stimulates it for some people. That, ultimately, is my goal, and so I will not hold back over the course of this pathworking.

ā€“

I simply desire to be. All else is arbitrary.

I felt layers and layers of myself unfurling and expanding out from myself and into the world. I saw the angels within me, from whence they came, and knew that from me the world around me is created. I felt a great fire burning within.

I saw and felt myself transform into an angelic form.

I saw a great ring of fire within me, and felt the sound ā€œOā€ vibrating throughout the inner universe.

The angels held before me a book, though at this time it was unclear. I felt that it held the secrets to reality, and that these secrets are being revealed to me.

I knew that as I was being re-created from the core, so was the world.

I contemplated A and O, the beginning and the end.

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Thanks for this, @shinri. Awesome stuff!

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Development

The theme of this week has largely been the dropping of resistance. Resistance is often very important for protecting ourselves and staying true to what we believe, but maybe even more often resistance is just a blockage that prevents us from doing what we want to be doing.

I am moving into a new chapter of my life, and in this time I will be developing and cultivating an entirely new set of skills and learning a new set of knowledge, both in a mundane and magickal sense (as if that really needs to be said). I have known of this for some time, and I have navigated my life to be able to enter this opportunity, but finally being confronted with it and the massive changes that come along with it brought deeply felt resistance that I had been trying to ignore to the surface. Feelings of guilt and fear were most prominent.

In contemplating these feelings, I realized the amount of change I have undergone in the past few years. I am nothing like who I used to be, and when confronted with a similar degree of change once more my ego-mind sensed its demise. My emotions gave rise to a sense of resistance at the possibility of them being re-configured. The possibility of becoming something which I previously thought of in some negative light gave rise to discomfort.

In contemplating these feelings and working the magick, this resistance began to fall away and be replaced with other emotions. Feelings of discomfort gave way to fascination.

ā€“

All of my Arts, when Conjoined, give rise to Metals, all the treasures and precious things of the Earth.

I saw the Earth, and I saw it as four pieces locked and joined together. I saw it as a sphere of shifting energy.

As I am continuously shifting and changing, the world shifts and changes to suit my development.

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Becoming

There were little in the way of visions or crazy experiences this week, but what I sensed behind these letters and names is power. I had been coming to doubt the point of this magick, and had been considering setting it aside and turning to other methods. What changed my mind was not an intense rush of energy or some huge manifestation. What changed my mind was a subtle feeling of power. That was all it took.

I have been reminded that, in every constant moment of becoming and unfolding, most people try to stop those who are successful. There are countless reasons that they will give for this, but none of them matter and few if any are true. Fear plagues the minds of many and binds them into mediocrity. Perhaps you have heard of the ā€œcrabs in a barrelā€ analogy. Those who are controlled by fear or who are just too stupid or lazy or entitled or close-minded or whatever so easily become jealous of others who overcome their obstacles and let go of their limitations. This jealousy is like a parasitic virus, draining and damaging those it infects and spreading through them to others. I would say it is so much easier to adopt this mindset and wallow in your own pathetic existence than it is to make the commitment to make something out of your life, but it really is not. It is just as easy to choose to be successful as it is to choose to hate your life. The process may not always be easy, but setting the course is.

Where I disagree with many who share this belief is in what constitutes a ā€œsuccessfulā€ life. I do not feel the need to engage with the cult of hyper-productivity. Most self-help types place such a huge degree of focus on productivity, productivity, productivity, productivity, work work work work work and I find it all to be tiresome and just plain unenjoyable. There is great pleasure to be found in skillful activity, and for me this pleasure is sometimes, but not always, connected to what most would call ā€œproductive.ā€

Take my writing here, for instance. To date I have made a whopping $0 through my occult writing. Sometimes I feel like I should, but really I donā€™t particularly care. The money would be nice, sure, but Iā€™m not allowed to just advertise a patreon here where my audience is, and occult writing isnā€™t exactly the best way (or even a particularly good way) to make money, and all the time I would have to spend on running an occult business I could use for far less tedious activities. I have chosen an inherently quite profitable profession to cut down on as much ā€œwork for workā€™s sakeā€ as is absolutely possible, and once I have enough money I will only stay in that profession for as long as the game is fun for me to play. There is so much more that life can give to me that is nourishing and fulfilling other than just work, and I feel zero need to force some ā€œlegacyā€ onto the world. I do what I do because I like doing it, and if other people find some value in it, then that really is great and wonderful, but my primary motivation is my own hedonism, and I see no reason to change that.

Call me a selfish bastard if you want, but Iā€™m not going to argue with you.

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Any updates?

I was doing SM daily until October.

I was compelled to take a break. I have no idea why but I was literally falling asleep in the middle, or got distracted and forgot what I was doing. It was frustrating but I got a clear ā€œTAKE A BREAKā€ vibes.

I started up again this week where I left off (27) and it feels right. Iā€™m now into 28.

Anyone else feel compelled to take a break in the middle of a nonstop marathon SM attempt?