I may be wrong and i’m just going crazy, but I seriously need someone to let me know how to solve this.
(Also, english is not my native language, feel free to ask if you didn’t understand something)
So I have this best “friend” that I’ve been hanging with during almost my entire life. (ill try going straight to the point and not write too much) I’ve always felt like i have bad luck around him and whenever I would play sports with him I would always lost and perform very bad, there were times i would jokingly tell to him he is using black magic on me (now I’m realizing its not a joke after all). I have noticed that he influences me very easily, like he asks me things and I would respond without question, or persuades me to do favors, maybe this is just because he is my best friend and i have too much confidence with him, but when i ask him something he doesn’t responds me as easily as i would. Whenever im not with him for like 1 week or more, i feel with lots of energy and less anxiety. I went to spend 6 months in Canada away from my family and country last year and I felt GREAT, I felt more free and with lots of energy around all those months, my mind was more stable and i was working hard at the gym like never before. When I got back to my country I have felt to this day, so fucking bad, I no longer have energy to go to the gym and lost all motivation to do anything, I begged my mom to send me with the psychologist because i suspected i had adhd, because my attention span got fucked and my school grades got so bad, but the doctor said it was just depression and nothing to worry about, and he may be right but I feel something weird is going on, since my friend got a girlfriend like 2 months ago and I’ve been feeling a lot better when he got distracted with her. I got interested in psychedelics (haven’t tried them, but I will soon, I smoke weed sometimes tho) and the spiritual world, and recently discovered magick, felt like destiny. I recently tried summoning sargatanas (i have to say im skeptical with these things but wow I got some results really fast) and got deeply interested in magic. When i learnt about all this stuff I thought I might be cursed after all, and got thinking in who might be the cause of all these, everything clicked when I thought about my him and the weird things he have done, there is always a moment when he snaps his fingers 3 times when I am with him, he took my shirt and many objects of mine that I have asked him to return to me but he hasn’t, my bad luck when im with him, and the past weekend there was this really strange moment when we were going to the movie theater with his girlfriend and other friend, I was going to throw a glass bottle (we were outside of my house and they were waiting for me with my mom in the car) and instead of throwing it in the can like a normal person would do, I immediately threw it in the street like I lost all control, when i got in the car I got so embarrassed and my mom was mad at me, weirdly enough i heard my friend snapped his fingers 3 times. He also doesn’t want me to smoke weed (which is weird because I’d said to him it makes me relax and feel better) and whenever i smoke i feel more normal, conscious and free.
Maybe these are just all coincidences, but i don’t know, that’s why I need your help and opinions.
Aside from this topic, do any of you have constantly watched the number 11? It started appearing when i got hooked with spiritual stuff.
