I’ve learned recently that I’m 90% sociopathic only differences are I can feel love and I have a little empathy and can sometimes feel guilt so yeah makes more sense why I’m so different but still kinda a wake up call to me
Everyone has such to a degree… even empaths can be quite monstrous… you just perceive and interact with the world in a way that others do not. It’s not always a scary nor bad thing unless you have less than desirable behaviors that need addressing. Which can be done for sure. I get tired of people always shaming those that are on a spectrum they do not understand. There are many wonderful things that come with that and I think many fail to see such nor celebrate the gifts it does bring.
I think alot of those tests are purposely put out there by psychiatrists to drum up business. Hypochondria sells.
im quite sociopathic actually. its not so bad. fpr example a kid can cry in front of me and i wont give a damn
I agree to some extent, however medical fields are a science and should not be totally discarded even though now a days everyone is quick to label and dip in the pocket book.
I see where you’re coming from, Luna. I’m referring mostly to those articles and questionnaires you see online about psychological ailments as well as others which list vague symptoms and if you score over X% or fit these descriptions then your likely to be a (fill in the blank).
I figured… and I agree. Like I said everyone has such to some degree… hell when I’m in one mindset I’d score highly for such and in another mindset I’d score very low… but then again just by that admission I’d score very high for disassociative identity disorder lol. or bi polar even…
I use alot of self control but it’s bwen slipping some lately
Do you have a values clash of some kind - two things you want are opposed in some way, maybe you’re having to choose, and the friction is making everything harder and making you angrier?
Unlike the white-lighters, I don’t think anger (or even hate) are automatically pathological, but if you’re getting mad angry as a baseline and that’s increasing, it may be a sign of some kind of internal conflict over things.
Or maybe you’re just surrounded by assholes!
I literally had to leave work early because I picked up a hammer snuck up behind my coworker raised it up ready to bash his head I was just so raged I was ready to kill but I stopped myself before swinging then I made an excuse and left before I completely lost it
I have to go with Lady Eva on this one… and mind you… we ALL have behaviors and struggles that need to be acknowledged and addressed… anger and hate are often shunned and shamed though perfectly permissible as healthy… aggression is good in the right format.
Well… unless you enjoy the color orange as a fashion statement I’d venture to say that is not an aggression worthy format…
what bothers me is that’s a level I never got to before I’ve thought of it but never came close today showed me just how far it’ll go if I can’t control myself
I can relate… Both mundane and magic wise… yes I made the distinction because one will put you in prison and thus far the other does not here anyway…
I’m curious… what entities are you drawn to or vice versa what do you tend to attract?
I work with Azazel, Ahmet (destruction entity), and Set
Ah… makes sense. I can understand how those entities bring things to the surface so you can face them… destruction is not bad at all… nor are the emotions you are feeling surface… my guess… and I could be wrong… is you have some past trauma resurfacing? Emotions you did not deal with or at least fully? I ask because usually these tend to be associated with past trauma experiences and while your diagnosis of sociopath or psychopath may be right on cue… The deeper levels of such a thing and what such entities will have you go through in order to surpass limitations as well as understand yourself more and fully will surface in some very odd ways lol
they cover most of the emotion I actually feel sober
Well, it’s like you’re building muscle in a gym, really making gains, and still trying to wear the same t-shirts and jackets that fitted you before.
Not going to work - something’s going to give.
Respect your growth and altered power level, and find ways to safely ground, transmute, or otherwise use that rage. It’s a vital current of life, but there can be too much of even the best things.
Any kind of enhanced practice does this, as well - the most traditional yoga teachers recommend that anyone prone to anger or depression goes very easy on yoga asanas (poses), and meditation, because these raise energy which then - instead of going towards that person’s desired spiritual goals - instead, feeds into the negative channels of depressed or enraged energy, and actually sets the person further back from the peace of mind they were seeking.
Now, while the goals and general vibe of that world are NOT what most of us on here are seeking, there’s wisdom to it - too much energy when you’re a bit prone to certain mental states can fuck you up, this is why a lot of black magicians struggle with drink, drugs, addictions in general, the heightened energies we have to contend with are also raising every single desire and hunger within us, and it can get a bit too much at times.
It’s not a bad thing that it happens, getting out of balance then snapping back is pretty much the norm on this path, what it seems to me that you need is a way to safely “ground” these energies before you do indeed end up as Big Bubba’s special friend, serving time because your rage got the better of you.
So, first, ask your spirits.
And maybe Hathor could help - she’s very loving, she’s also the counterpart of Sekhmet, a goddess who became so enraged that she almost wiped out humanity, and was only prevented from doing so by her father giving her beer disguised as blood, which she drank until she passed out.
The struggle is real!! :o)
She possesses almost infinite wisdom and NOT in some lame-ass manner about “rise above the anger, and talking in a fluting voice about enlightenment” - but whatever you choose, don’t just leave it to chance or ignore it, or dump it into something self-destructive - it deserves respect.
yeah my friends think I have a drinking problem and smoke weed too much because the only time I’m normally sober is at work