Hello everyone! Welcome to my journal of sorts. This will be a place for all my informal thoughts, questions and notes. Everyone please feel free to chime in with comments, questions, experiences and what not. Your words are encouraged. Let’s begin…
Winterfield’s Demons of Magic (DoM) arrived earlier this week so I will be diving into that later today. The book was a little pricey but I know it will be well worth it. I immediately flipped though a few pages when it arrived and it looks super interesting. I also bought S. Connolly’s Demonolatry book which I plan on studying after DoM.
Thinking about getting a set of runes. I’ve never had any interest in them, but I suddenly felt drawn to them a few weeks ago when I was at a local shop. I didn’t end up purchasing them because they were expensive, but my mind is still curious about them.
Hey, welcome to the forum. You should find the book useful. My best advice is to condense all the ritual instructions into three pages as i did, and try to commit that to memory. And then you can take it with you during ritual in case you forget something.
The past few days I have been studying Winterfield’s DoM, and have made it through the Ritual Opening and the Core Opening. These first few pages have challenged my entire thought process and have forced me to open my mind. Everything for me has always been black or white, good or bad, this or that, etc. And now I’m seeing that this isn’t the case at all.
I need to practice meditating.
Also, is EA’s Complete Works worth the investment (financially speaking but time wise as well)? Or are some books individually more valuable (spiritually speaking) than others? I’ve found it online for a good price…
Today’s plan WAS to reread and master the first 2 sections of DoM and then prepare for Ritual One. But I was told today that my mother is ill and I don’t feel the greatest either and I feel as though my energy and intentions need to be directed for healing and protection right now. The search engine suggested working with Marbas for healing from an illness and protection? Someone also suggested Raphael (the angel?) but then others said definitely NOT Raphael…
Back to the search engine it is…
I’ve been studying S. Connolly’s book, Demonolatry, the past few days. It’s very different from my other current study of DoM. I’m struggling to find my place, of where all my beliefs fit together nicely. And they’re not. But perhaps they’re not supposed to. If one were to understand everything perfectly, perhaps they would in reality understand nothing at all. I don’t think we’re meant to have a rational explanation for everything. Some things just are, or were, or will be, in time.
There is a delicate balance between respect and humbleness. I find myself stuck: fighting for what I desire or being content with what I have. An endless cyclical battle.
Anyway. Lunch with family later today, followed by some errands. Hoping to buy some more reading material. I can hardly keep up with this urge for more knowledge. Trying to keep emotions in check. It’s been a difficult work week, thankful for a day off finally.
Infernal Blessings to you all today and always ~Rami
Currently reading book #2 of the Nine Demonic Gatekeeper series (Lucifer). Evoking Eternity and Book of Azazel are sitting on my shelf, next in line. I find myself overwhelmed with EA’s experiences. Overwhelmed is the wrong word. I am envious. I have been spiritually “blind and deaf” lately to Lucifer and feel hopeless. A while back Lucifer told me he is always here, I am never alone, but I know he wants me to work on myself (?) first before he will fully show himself to me. And I’m sullen and frustrated with it. Which is probably the reason why. I act childish and have no emotional control.
Not sure if this is anything but throughout the book (I’m not that far into it yet) there are of course mentions of the other gatekeepers and one particular name that keeps standing out is Belial. When I read his name, I feel what I can only call a stirring of my senses: I can feel soil shifting, I can smell the dirt and hear the squish of worms in the earth. I don’t know. I feel unworthy trying to talk to Belial or Lucifer or anyone for that matter. I am no one.
Depression and anxiety have been bad this week, obviously.
You should find the book useful. My best advice is to condense all the ritual instructions into three pages