In this case, I will suggest one thing only - get the book, “MAP: The Co-Creative White Brotherhood Medical Assistance Program” by Machaelle Small Wright. Which is available on amazon on Kindle and paper, and work through just the first couple of chapters, it’s very easy but very powerful and will work over time.
You don’t need to become an occultist, you have ONE problem to fix, so do not bother with learning how spells work and summoning and all that - you can get to that when your brain is better. Just learn how to heal yourself and work with Nature and these ascended human healers to help you.
