Please keep me in your prayers

All I’m asking is you keep me in your prayers to Michael, Lucifer and Ra

I am battling suicidal thoughts and I don’t know where they will take me

More than once I’ve been told by others I’m a warrior, Koetting and others saw it

But my constant battles are tiring

This is not an appeal for attention, just asking to keep me in your prayers

You need to develop coping mechanisms to battle suicidal thoughts. And when something emerges, you take it. Some other emotion, like a deep sadness or rage. Then you’ll have the need to deal with it, but it is way better than the suicidal thoughts.

All in all, they’ll come in waves (and yes, some waves will be insanely long), but it is a storm you’ll have to weather to keep going.

Also, see a fucking professional, is very seldom that the suicidal thoughts are permanent, so use the available tools.

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I am seeing a professional, I got sent to the hospital a couple times

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Good. Keep doing it. I’m not going to sugarcoat it to you, since that would be the less helpful thing, but it is something that you can overcome by not giving up. The train of thought eventually changes, maybe just a little, but enough to try to recharge your mental battery, so to speak.

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I don’t think it’s helping tho, my problems are rooted in the spiritual, and having parasite abuse, and being unable to connect to my guides, I was able to evoke Lucifer once last year but it didn’t last, idk.

It’s interesting because in the scans given to me it seems nothings wrong

But I do feel like my energy has been damaged ever since the parasite abuse last year

I did get some results praying in my dreams, like when I asked Michael to send me 2 angels

Or when I called Lucifer, Lilith and Satan

I keep trying to meditate in my dreams

Well, if all the scans say the same… you know.

In any event, the mechanism is always the same = trigger followed by an episode, probably a very harrowing moment and the need to release the pressure, one way or another. I can be more or less tamed.

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Take care boy , keep strong I’m curious to see how you will be in one year or two , we grow and battle with our adversities on a regular basis , be strong , you are fierce tested by fate , but it always get easier :slight_smile: keep strong
My life isn’t all that shiny at all but fuck it i wanna see the end of it so I don’t have suicidal tendencies anymore , i mean lots of awful things have happened and I’m still here breathing with all the tools I need to overcome this harsh life , so fuck it I’m gonna keep going on !

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I’m actually doing some “comfort” rituals tonight. I’ll include you.

I had a hard time with this after the War. If I don’t have a direction I’m going, I flounder, get lost, and get depressed. So, I set goals of all lengths in different areas - even gaming. That way I can always progress in something, see results towards something, and that helps me see that I’m more than I sometimes thing I am when I am dealing with ptsd and similar. Sometimes I do this with the quantity of things I get done, sometimes the quality. Usually a mix.

Hope it helps.

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PTSD sucks, I dealt with it for a year, luckily I got out of it

And thanks for including me in your rituals

You’re a warrior too? Are you a soldier?

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Was. I was an Infantryman in Iraq. I have childhood ptsd, too. It’s managed quite nicely, but does rear its head from time to time.

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I’ve never been to physical war, my battles have always been spiritual

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Scars are scars.

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Please go back to the hospital you need that if you are feeling this way. It will at the every min keep you safe. If you think it is rooted in the spiritual tell them all to fuck off and block and detach from it. The best part of free will is you can walk away at anytime. I walked away for about 10-15 years becuse I wasn’t ready I didn’t have the partner or the knowledge to deal with what I have been given. I am only now in the past two years really diving back in but that’s because I have a partner that is here to support and guide me and teach me.

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