So for the longest time I’ve been thinking about looking up the numerology associated with my name in order to figure out what planet it corresponds to, and then further try to figure out my magickal name. To me, the magical name has always been something that’s slipped between the lines. I’ve tried out a ton, but never found that divine resonance that I felt it required.
So I finally look up the number, get my planet, and turns out it’s the same exact planet that I’ve ALWAYS felt drawn to ever since I got into magick. Funny how that works huh? To me, there’s never been any question about my belonging to Saturn. After checking the numerology, ding ding; Saturn.
So here’s the crazy thing. I look up the sigil while watching EA’s lecture on evoking spirits on youtube. In the video, he’s going over charging sigils. Now I’ve done this before, but the emphasis on how easy it is just made think, “Hm. Maybe I’ll connect to Saturn and see if it has anything for me.”
I want to make this clear; I’ve only recently even ventured the guess that I’m successfully channeling. I’ve never done an evocation and my magical vision is nonexistant. However, when I looked at the sigil and pulled back my vision, it went fucking crazy. It literally felt like a lightning bolt of energy immediately jumped out of the screen and smashed into my chest. I knocked my screen off the table to get it away and sat there shaking and holding my head in a fetal position for about a minute before I got up, looked over, and just thought to myself; “Damn.” as though that summed up the entire occasion.
So here’s my question. I’m deeply, deeply connected to Saturn. I’ve felt the pull my entire life, and upon arriving in the occult around a year ago I figured out what it was exactly that the feeling was; Saturn itself. I want to keep working on it and more deeply explore it, without potentially screwing myself. What are your recommendations to proceed? Any time I even give it a sideways glance I can feel the incarnate current reaching out to me. Should I just dive in and see what happens? I know Saturn is related to the darker energies of death and such, so I want to be careful with it.
To me, Saturn isn’t just a gateway; it’s the universe itself.
Aside from this, I really want to learn more about Saturn in lore and history. I’ve done some research and found a few angels and such associated with it, but really there’s not a lot of information that I can really sink my teeth into. Perhaps it’s the death current I’ve been feeling, I don’t know, but I want to learn more. Any good reading or videos or such?
It’s a strange feeling, being suddenly tied to the source… the source of what? I don’t know. But I need to.