So yeah, I’m still new to very many things in magick: I try to know well what I do know, but there’s so much I haven’t the faintest broader conception of. One of these possibilities I’d like to ask the more experienced people here about, is about the likelihood of this morning’s dream in your more learned opinions.
The night before (well, into this morning honestly) was a bit rough, plenty of drinking and celebratory silliness all around, so I should have known that in my increasing “old age” a bad hangover was utterly unavoidable.
Except, I didn’t have a bad hangover on waking, or any hangover at all for that matter. Here is what I dreamed.
I was walking outdoors in the sunlight, through open fields that maybe once were pastureland but now blossomed unorganized in riotous colour. Little lone trees were scattered here and there, and I headed towards one in particular on a small hill. When I neared it, there was a kind of shimmer in the air and it formed a pretty much humanoid outline. The figure was definitely ‘there’ after a moment, but details of its features were obscured by a peculiar trick, like rather than being covered up in shadows it was covered up by the lighting. I realized that this was a spirit that’s sympathetic to me and has been starting to ‘come out of the woodwork’ with my recent commitment to magick, and the realization that I could see it this clearly clued me in that I was dreaming.
This initiated the kind of ‘vertigo’ that I get pretty often when trying to become lucid: all of my surroundings began twisting and turning like a spirited horse trying to ‘throw’ me back into ignorant oblivion, and I began trying to stabilize myself and ‘ride it out’. The figure placed his hand on my shoulder and everything became calm.
Now I don’t want to get too far into my ‘theoretical underpinnings’ I’ve been making do with for lucid dreaming, but in my limited experience, my LDs have indicated some kind of “layering of the soul”. A lot of my LDs, have been -me- technically, but it’s been I guess my “animalistic soul”, full of violent and animal urges and being a real bastard to those around me - like a dog that knows its opportunity in a place is rather limited so it goes all out before its time is up. I venture that this “animal soul” is of course much closer to the physical body and physiologically-derived instincts.
-Sometimes-, very rarely, I seem to become “full lucid”. This is like my “human soul”, more fully conscious and with better recollection of memories and motivations waking and dreaming. This “soul” is very weak in the lucid dream, at least right now. It has the lowest success rate so far in being able to ‘ride out the turbulence’ of first becoming lucid. Usually, not being ‘kicked out’ of the dream automatically seems to convert my dream consciousness to the “animal soul”.
When this spirit put his hand out to ‘steady’ me, the consciousness in the dream was something different. The “animal soul” seemed to have more raw power at first glance, had no real self-consciousness or awareness to speak of, and in the dream it carried out the goals deriving from the drives of the body. The “human soul” seemed pretty weak, although it has I believe great potential to learn and remember skills in the dream world, and its chief advantage lies in its recall and its consciousness - it is, basically, the personal waking ‘identity’ and will carry out its goals just as you would whilst awake, all depending on your ordinary waking level of enlightenment. This new mode of dream consciousness I might call the “magickal soul”. It was more conscious than the “animal soul”, certainly more enlightened, more so it seems than the ‘full lucid’ consciousness which would love to awake and then -remember- some of what the “magickal soul” knows - and while the “animal soul” is strong in a raw way but uncreative, the “magickal soul” has such clever and intuitive ways of accomplishing its goals, but all without troubling the conscious mind! It’s as if it knows intimately, reflexively, the magickal procedures needed and does them without -needing- to overthink, letting the conscious awareness marvel briefly and then move on!
But enough of that theoretical garble, here’s what happened lol.
The spirit told me to follow, and disappeared. My magickal soul knew exactly what to do, and disappeared right after him, re-appearing in a different place. Wish I could tell you -how-, but that was such a simple thing to this level of consciousness that it wasn’t -worth- sparing a thought for. More experimentation while fully lucid will hopefully bring results in replicating this now that it’s been done. All I know is that it was a matter of -will- and creative intent.
I found myself in the interior of a church. I was puzzled, but the spirit smiled at my reaction and told me there was no need to be apprehensive about something impotent in itself. The real reason we were here was because of who else would be. Sure enough, just down the hall someone just appeared out of nowhere. My magickal soul “knew” that they had just dreamed themself there. We started walking toward each other, and the spirit seemed to blend perfectly into the background out of her sight, it’s voice resounded in my head, though, “SHOW ME WHAT YOU CAN DO.” At this point my conscious control took a back seat and the intuitive power of the magickal soul started showing what it knew but it was my goal to remember.
The other person was indeed a girl, young and pretty, and to my eyes a golden aura of purity shone around her, that of a true believer. I could also sense though that she was -not- in control of her dream, and however she might live whilst awake, here her restrained urges -would- find their outlet, because her waking religion was not in perfect harmony with her subsurface desires.
I saw in her eyes attraction, also trepidation through her lack of ‘experience’ if nothing else. My magickal soul advanced to her and kept her eyes locked, and her dream self wanted more and more to indulge in the forbidden, but rather hilariously she didn’t know how so she just stood there trembling like a frightened rabbit. The magickal soul took her hands, without malice, without love, merely performing its task. My magickal soul kissed her, and she flinched dutifully but then began to return it, more and more energetically. At this point her aura began to flare, and the plain golden light of earlier vanished like so much thin smoke in a strong gust to be replaced with all sorts of bold, vibrant, -strong- colours that lay under the surface. I may dress up the words now out of a vague “guilt” at preying on someone weaker (the strong are fair game), but the magickal soul was quite dispassionate - it also knew that she would survive, and her “purity” would be intact, she’d just still be stuck in the same ill-fitting spirituality when she woke up.
I bit her then on the lip, and she was into that, too, and from that acceptance of that slight bit of pain I was able to siphon energy from her. There was a lot of it (more I believe than more profligate individuals would have retained), and I only took a relatively small amount. The point here I believe was what the spirit was trying to teach me about letting the “magickal soul” take over and seeing just what it could do as if it were the most natural thing in the world.
The spirit left me after that, and she left either for another dream or to wake up, and the rest of my morning was spent lucidly roaming around and thinking over what had happened. Which did not stop after I awoke. I honestly wasn’t even going to post this at first, but I have to know your opinions.
Is something like this possible? Was that another actual person that I “borrowed” energy from to stymie my hangover? Was it a dream construct, and does that matter since the results were the same? Is there even a way to know? Can anyone elaborate on the different “levels” of consciousness, and has anyone experienced anything like the “magickal soul”?
I wish I could post a massive block of text like that and be able to -tell- people something useful, but it looks like I’ve just ended up -asking- instead. But, would anyone care to weigh in on this?
Thanks for your time,
Claidheam
