Hi there, I’ve been here for a few years, but I’ve decided to make a new account as I embark on a new life path. There’s baggage from that other time in my life that I need to put behind me, so I won’t mention my old username. @Lady_Eva I hope this is okay - please let me know if I should PM you my old username. I do still want to maintain access to the PM history in that account~
So to introduce myself, I’m an eclectic spiritualist practicing a mixture of spirit work under a Buddhist-like framework. I believe in reincarnation and other worlds besides this one. I also believe individuality is essential, though, and so unlike Buddhism, I don’t ever want to merge back with the One.
I’m fairly sure that this is the first time I’ve incarnated as human or anything human-like. My past life right before this one was as a wolf, and it has carried over into this iteration of me heavily. I still think my soul is that of a wolf, and as such, I would describe myself as a therian. That essentially means that I identify in part as an animal even despite my human body.
I’m also a medical scientist by trade, and am about to go into the final year of my PhD program. I’ve dedicated my career to studying the bioscience required to give certain animal features. I used to focus a lot on shapeshifting, and when I realized how extremely difficult that is, I turned to science. My goal is to one day have certain surface level physical features of my wolf self. Big thank you to Marbas for nudging me firmly in this direction!
I primarily work with Marbas and Dantalion. So far, I’m still very limited in my perception of them, and have found the best way to communicate to be via petition letters. I can feel their presence, but cannot see nor hear them, as much as I very strongly wish I could.
PS: I’m also an enby, and my pronouns are he/him or they/them - either set is fine. Nice to re-meet you all :3
@inquisitivewolf Duplicate accounts are against the rules of this forum. Please tell me your previous username as one account has to be closed.
Since this is a start over, please provide more information on your experience.
How long have you been practicing?
Do you have any experience in systems or traditions outside of Buddhism?
Since probably ~2016, on and off, but more seriously in the most recent couple of years.
I’m more experienced in Demonolatry! I still work with the Goetic demons and have a high affinity for them.
I wouldn’t say I have much experience in Buddhism, and mostly treat it as a container for my general belief system.
To elaborate on that belief system, Buddhists believe there are 6 worlds of incarnation: Deva (gods), Manusya (humans), Asura (demi-gods), Tiryag (animals), Preta (hungry ghosts/restless spirits), and Naraka (hell). These are the modifications I believe:
- Manusya refers to human-like beings, not just humans. There is more than one world containing life of comparable intelligence and capacity for self-reflection. Many of them vary greatly in form and the physics present in those worlds. The one constant is that beings of manusya have very high capacity for self-reflection.
- There is a manusya-tiryag continuum, not a direct division between humans and animals. Where you are in that continuum influences where you’ll go next. So for a very intelligent and self-reflective species like crows, it would be easier for them to make the jump to humans in their next life, whereas it would be hard for a mouse to do so.
- Naraka doesn’t exist the way the texts say. Instead, when we die, we judge ourselves and suffer in guilt if we’ve done terrible things. That is our punishment - being consumed by inconsolable guilt.
I also think you have some amount of choice in what you incarnate as, unlike in Buddhism, where samsara is seen as a more passive process.
Right now, I’m trying to get better at meditation so that I can get in tune with my past lives and with understanding the nature of the world.
I guess I should also elaborate on my general goals, too! They are relatively straightforward:
- Work on managing my depression and physical illnesses better.
- Learn to meditate properly to achieve a more peaceful and higher vibrational state of mind.
- Build a healthy relationship and life together with my new SO.
- Become increasingly open about my therian identity (again, my soul is still that of a wolf - it carried over from my past life) and comfortable showing that part of myself on the outside physically
- Either become sure of what comes after death, or else avoid death as long as possible, up to and including cryonics. I need to know what’s on the other side before ever allowing myself to go there.
Thank you for elucidating more upon your experience, and welcome back to the forum.