I have been in a rut for a bit now, and I have introduced myself to the Norse gods: Tyr, Thor, Odin and Loki. I offered them libations and told them I wanted to work with them. I told them of my military aspirations and my need to make the journey from Malkuth to Yesod. Then I started slacking. Then my laptop broke. Then I prayed to them again and apologized and thanked Loki, presuming what happened with my laptop to be his handiwork. I recognized how it is meant to help. I then asked Loki to help me get out of my rut of complacency and stagnation, as well as to help me journey from Malkuth to Yesod. I started swimming each day for a bit but then the pool got closed down. I once again find myself back in my usual habits. I have prayed that the Gods be patient with me, yet truth is I feel bad about myself. I know I can do better. I worry I’m pissing them off with my laziness.
I also find myself drawn to Belial lately. I know he’s similar to Loki in a number of regards, but sounds scarier. Sounds hard-assed. Tough love teaching style to a heavy extent. Like a Drill Instructor if a DI was a chaos god. But if my ambitions are military, maybe that kinda kick in the ass is what I need? I have looked up more about him and see a possible link between Belial and Set (I was looking to see if there was a link between him and Loki or not) and Set is aasociated with death, an archetype I feel strongly connected to. I also found Set is associated with redheads amd ruddy skinned people and it just so happens I’m a ginger LOL. I also funny enough remember my teacher once recalling past lives in ancient Egypt and remarking that I looked Egyptian. When I told her that’s strange to say considering I’m ginger, she pointed out that all kinds of people lived in Egypt back then. I’ll take it with a grain of salt, but since the journey from Malkuth to Yesod represents the dying process, and since Set is associated with things like death, I do feel there may be some connection.
I am wondering how to proceed. Should I continue working with the Norse Gods? Should I consider working with Belial? Both? I remember EA Koetting recommending that we beginners work with just 3 entities at first so we can get used to their energies. Should I work with Tyr, Loki and Belial then? What of Thor and Odin?
Also, in a tarot reading regarding how to make my archetypal death journey, a member of this forum said that there is a spirit watching over me that has great plans for me. Who is this spirit and how do I connect with them?
Can anybody tell me if there is anything any of these afformentioned entities would like to say to me or like me to know? Can anybody here find out who the involved spirit mentioned in the tarot is?
Any advice for me?
I appreciate your help. Thank you all in advance.