Hi, I’m new to this forum and it seems to be a good place to ask for advice.
Let me introduce myself, I’m 33 years old and live in Holland. I’ve had quite some experience with Magick in my teen years, mostly invocation of angels and deceased friends, but after a few frighting experiences I turned my back to it.
The last 2 months have been a frustrating period in my life, as I encountered some serious problems. I have spend nights trying to forget about them using a lot of drugs (way too much) and alcohol, almost not sleeping at all. Suddenly I was experiencing some poltergeist activity. First only as a ‘feeling’ of a presence which I dismissed. I assumed it was the cocaine. The next night however I clearly saw objects moving and I could no longer ignore it, but I wanted to. To overcome the fear I faced the energy I felt and told it it wasn’t real and that it couldn’t harm me. About 10 minutes later my living room window spontaniously broke into a hundred pieces.
My first thought was that I had mocked or ‘offended’ the entity and it was showing me just how real it was. I barricated the window and went to sleep. When I woke up I felt like a different person, in a bad way. I stared into the mirror and couldn’t recognize my eyes The days after that I got obsessed with everything that a christian would consider sins or evil. I spend hours listening to demonic prayers as the words seem to fill me, I felt this immense power growing and becoming an addiction. When I walked outside I looked at people passing by and I felt the urge to fight, even to kill them just to release the energy inside me. It was consuming me.
Yesterday I finally contacted an old friend who is very experienced in the occult, he adviced me to perform the lesser banishing ritual, and I did. And it worked. I felt a strong presence and asked the archangel Michael for assistance. Almost instantly I felt a transformation and I bursted out in tears because of the emotions. I felt pure positive energy fill my body and my house. I meditated on Michael’s energy and after a couple of minutes I was able to communicate. I asked him why I became the victim of this all and his response was “You have attracted negativity because of your behaviour.”
As I don’t really believe in the duality of good and evil, I asked him if I could contact any spirit (demon or angel) for assistance in the future, he answered me 'your focus becomes your reality, choose wisely which path you take". Is this a message as in ‘don’t get involved with demons’? Or was it my subconcious mind reflecting the values of the christian environment around me? I’m really interested in the opinion of you guys, as I’m sure some of you have experience with the evocation of demons. I’m want to take this path to the next step and use the power we all have, but I’m confused. Please advice, thank you!