My weird problem

I have this what I consider a subconscious issue where I can’t stop lusting for result when it comes to something I really want.

The reason why I have this issue is because years ago when I was younger I’ve dealt with putting my full faith in something and ended up being disappointed with not getting what I wanted, that stays in my mind to this day and it affects my magick.

I just want someone on here to help me get over this and possibly see things from a different view. I’ve searched and searched on how to not lust for results and nothing changed me. So if there’s anything you guys can say or do that would be amazing thank you :pray:

Depends what you mean by lust for results? I don’t think we have to stop wanting the thing, we just want to not fear that the magik isn’t working.

I have the opposite problem. As a child I was punished for wanting anything and denied self expression. I learned quickly how not to want anything, and to this day I have a hard time knowing what I want, and keeping hold of it long enough to even get into ritual. It’s very easy for me to shrug and let go of anything. I can do a ritual, and forget I did it, and also forget I wanted the thing and forget it ever existed. It’s a built in defense mechanism. But it can feel like I have no will sometimes. It’s possible to not give enough fucks to function successfully as a mage.

I think your version is healthier actually :slight_smile: But ideally as mages something in between would be good.
So I think this could be a practice thing? Maybe practice letting go of attachment to small things, thinking your way through what would happen if you didn’t get it, would it really matter - you’ll live after all, how in a year you might have no need for it anyway or have replaced it, etc etc. You talk yourself out of wanting it.

You don’t want to do that for magik, of course, because you don’t want to set up energy against yourself like I can and do sometimes, but then the skill base is there to stop worrying about it so much.

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I understand :pray: but the thing is for example I would ask a spirit to assist me with something and I would sense that they said yes and I would also get a tarot reading done about the spirit and what they want me to know and I would get a confirmation through that too that the spirits on board and that they just want me to let go, but even though I got multiple confirmations my subconscious still won’t let go fully that’s my issue :joy:

If practicing on your own isn’t going to help, then that sounds more like something to go over in therapy, as those folks specialise in working through subconscious issues. … might have to tell them it’s about something else than a magik working, but the advice would hopefully be applicable.

If you want to try entities to help, what about Leraye, for mental strength. Or Buer to help uncover and deal with the root cause?

You might try to make a sigil representing the effect/object/spell you are essentially trying to abort or let go of and put it on paper and burn it. Otherwise words or some kind of physical representation then once you see it burnt your subconscious should recognize that it is gone and let go. I say this obviously as a way to stop a spell you decided against and not as a way to put it in gnosis as this would cancel itself out…

If that is what you are asking anyways. I’m having a hard time understanding the question…

What don’t you understand about it?? @Samael-Azazel

Are you saying that you are having trouble putting your intentions into gnosis because you are obsessively lusting after results or are you saying that you are trying to abort a spell, but still have a subconscious lust for said intention?

I’m just saying I’m having a hard time for a spell to work correctly because of my subconscious lust for results @Samael-Azazel

Hmmm I think that as long as you are not consciously obsessing over the result there is no foul and since putting a spell into gnosis requires it to be embedded in your subconscious then I would say any subconscious lust is just the magick itself at work as long as you are not consciously focusing on it when these thoughts arise you should be golden.

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