As you good people know, I have been struggling lately with an absolute failure to Astral Project, or otherwise achieve any states of altered consciousness at all.
I did a Tarot Reading with this as my query. I record all my Tarot Readings, the positions each card lands on, and my interpretation.
Interestly, the last two readings I did, the same card came up in the Hopes & Fears position, the Magus.
And of the three Outcome cards (as I use E.A.'s modified Celtic Cross with 3 cards in the Outcome position) two of them were exactly the same in the previous reading, those two cards being 3 of Disks, & 10 of Swords, Ruin.
I have determined I am in the midst of a Dark Night of the Soul. I am absolutely unable to alter my state of consciousness. Throughout my entire life, I have always found it difficult to Lucid Dream, Astral Project, and now that I have gotten in to magick and these abilities are crucial in my development, it is all the more important that I learn to do them.
I am not at all susceptible to Hypnosis and thus cannot hypnotize myself either.
I wasn’t at all surprised when the cards indicated I am in the middle of a Dark Night of the soul.
My evocations seem to be successful sometimes, in the sense that I get what I ask for, and other times it seems they aren’t at all. This makes it difficult to acquire the necessary confidence and assurance that the entity will indeed appear and listen to my call.
I’m really frustrated right now. This Dark Night of the soul is absolutely wearing on me.