My mom died, and i need help


#1

i have been hesitating about posting this here, but i feel the need to do it, since i consider the people of this forum kind of a spiritual family, and i am in time of need.

i will give here a brief introduction on the matter.
my mom and i lived seperately since she’s gone to work in Italy some 10 years ago. her job was being a caretaker of older persons. the last job she did was for a very wealthy family, where she took care of an old woman (who is actually an old nazi vampire bitch). that woman’s son, F.R. (who hired her) is very rich inheriter - owner of a generational bussiness. he laid my mom off the job the day before she was going to go to a one-month planned vacation. he knew he was going to do it weeks before that, but he didn’t say anything to her, he just handed her the papers the last day, and when she tried to talk to him, he turned the cheek and said that she can talk to his lawyer. so, stressed out, she went to vacation, jobless, and came to visit me.
in the days of her visitation, i led my mom through a series of meditations, and i even did the EA’s cleansing ritual, which he wrote about in the newsletter. we did the ritual on 12/21/2012. she was very calm and peaceful when around me, we talked a lot and we dealt with personal issues that we had to work out. everything was well except she didn’t have a job anymore. but i assured her that everything will go just fine because she is very good at what she does, and everybody knows that. i had my working in mind to help her find another job (which i failed). and i didn’t take her stress that seriously, which i should have. she was very positive on the outside, and calm while being with me… but i had no idea how much anxiety and stress she had when alone with her thoughts.

so she went back to Italy, dealt with sindicate and court, because that sonofabitch who hired and illegaly fired her when he found a cheaper substitution, didn’t even want to pay her for the last two months that she worked for him.

all the time i kinda knew that even though this is a rough period for her, going through a lot of stress, the things will get a lot better. but, 3 weeks after she went back, she suddenly died. in her sleep. she wasn’t sick, nor did she had obvious medical issues, at the age of 57. the day before she died, we talked on the phone. she wanted to check on me, because she had a feeling that something is very wrong with me. i assured her that everything is fine, and that calmed her. she later wrote to me on gtalk that she is happy when she sees me online, that’s how she knows that i’m allright.

for no apparent reason, i did a mini ritual before sleep for myself, to align myself with the divine feminine. i felt safe, secure, held in the arms of divine mother (something i really made up that night). and then she died.

this was a week ago. i talk little. i feel like a walking corpse. i cried so hard like i never did. and i went to Italy, had to deal with the police and sindicate and the court and banks and the morgue, organizing transportation to take her home, and going through all her stuff… i found the gemstones that i charged for her when she would visit me. and her parfume, and shoes… her laptop, with wich i logged into her facebook account… i made a call to my grandparents, her parents to tell them she died. it felt like my grandparents are going to die that moment of sheer grief.

i have no words really to describe how i feel.

when i was there, in Italy, dealing with everything, we also tried to call F.R.
as i don’t speak italian, one woman called him and asked him if he is willing to meet or talk to me. unsuprisingly, he was not cooperative. he was arrogant and he even denied that he owed her any money.
i do not know how does this man, F.R. looks like. i know his name and his cell phone number. i couldn’t get his picture nor his adress. he lives in another town. the thing is that people who i know there are actually scared of making enemies there, because they are foreigners (like my mom), doing lowers class jobs for the wealthy elite.

but for now, i have to put F.R. issue on hold, because more important thing is going on.

now i seek advice from the people here who feel they can give good advice on the following matter:

my mom is to be cremated on thursday. there will be no priest. she was a christian. exceptionally good woman, with a pure heart (i know this is standard to say for any dead person, but my mom really was a rare type of good selfless human being).
if i died, i wouldn’t want a priest. but, in her case, it only seemed natural to have a priest on her funeral.
but… the priests i contacted are fucking money-hungry bastards who make problems even now. i don’t know why it has to be so complicated. but it is. the cremation is to be done in one city (where the crematorium is located), then were are taking the urn to my grandparents city, which is yet in another country, to have a funeral. the priests will not show up, under the excuse that there is no ceremony for already-cremated. so they said that it “could be done” if they asked the highest clergy in the church, by letter (not even a phone or an e-mail), but then it would cost a lot more…
i spent all my money on the transportation and everything else and i entered a hefty debt. but it’s even not the money issue. i really don’t want to deal with those priests.

my only concern now is to help my mother. to give her any and all help i can. spiritually. there will be no priest.

i want her to be free, peaceful… to help her see the light.
i really have no spiritual insight on how to deal with this. if anyone can advise me, i would be very grateful.


#2

I don’t have an answer to your question for advice, but I lost my mother a few years ago and wanted to tell you that I’m sorry for your loss. Hang in there.


#3

My friend I am so sorry for your loss. I too have lost a father,cousin,best friend and many other people that were dear to me. Some have come to me in my sleep to show themselves or to put images in my head to convey a message. At first I cried when I saw them as I missed them so much. But I believe that they want the best for me and are not judgmental in what I do. That bond will always be there my friend just do what you think is right.


#4

My first instinct would be to suggest you evoke the appropriate entity(s) which you feel would be aligned with her to ease her transition. But, this is a very personal matter, so I’m not sure what sort of advice to truly give.

My condolences to you.


#5

I don’t get what you’re trying to do, the shade left behind does not rest and the true consciousness leaves the body to go to whatever permanent afterlife or recycling it chooses. There is nothing to be done for the shade, you could bind it to the skull if you had the skull and bury it but you said that you were having her cremated. As far as I know you cannot use ashes for much but I could be wrong on that, would have to evoke murmur or some other necromantic demon to find out. Best thing to do is to pour the ashes into running water deep in the woods and then cleanse your house so that the shade doesn’t come there. Shades can cause a lot of problems and typically don’t accept that they are dead, they just constantly linger around things… Believe me I’ve delt with restless shades before. Not something you want to run into, especially if a necromancer empowered them.


#6

My deepest condolances.
I agree with redcircle, summoning an appropriate psychopomp would probably be best. Considering that you are on the path you are by definition a form of priest so performing any final ceremony may be appropriate. In Christian dogma the archangel Michael is the most common psychopomp, although samael is also referenced but this is before “the fall”


#7

Truly sorry for your loss and the red tape your having to battle. I agree with Soundwave that I believe you are in need of a psychopomp. I would choose one that best suits her beliefs. Again, as Soundwave stated AA Michael is the most common and I believe would be appropriate. You could also asked other deceased family members to help her cross over like her own parents or siblings or husband etc.

I see nothing wrong with you performing a funeral rite for her, it would likely mean a lot to her that you were willing to do so ( I commend you for it). It would be coming from someone who loves her and shares her blood. I don’t believe you have to share in her beliefs to ask the spirits she worshipped to see her off. This is one of the last things you can do to show your love appreciation and respect and also give you some closure.

Again sorry for your loss, may your family find peace.


#8

I agree, sometimes priests make things worse. It is really terrible to see them saying the words of the funeral rite quickly or omitting things on purpose to finish faster. And based on what you’ve said about the priests you’ve contacted I would say that it would be much better if you’ve done something on your own.
I always believed that the funeral rites etc are for those who are left behind (the living). So I don’t think it’s worth it to get into so many troubles with finding a priest willing to do things properly.


#9

thank you guys for these valuable advices. i really appreciate this.

yes, Michael is really an obvious choise to make… i just didn’t see it. i have made all the preparations for the working. cremation is tomorrow morning, so this night is crucial. thank you all for your posts.


#10

Necromaster, can you share your experiences with restless shades?


#11

Very sorry bro, I know your pain its excruciating. As for the priest, I wouldn’t sweat it, your moms gone the priest is more for the living in my opinion. I’m sure she would be much happier with you doing the talking anyway not some man who knows nothing about her, but her loving son, who speaks with a pure heart and true raw emotion would be much more rewarding for her I’m certain of that. On another note make sure to decimate her former employer when your free, I hate to see people get hurt but that fuck need to feel the pain and torment! Hit em hard, and hope you get through this with as little pain as possible.


#12

I won’t talk about restless shades on this thread. Plus you would have to lay out some questions for me to answer as I tend to ramble and end up getting nowhere with the conversation


#13

thank you guys for posting on this subject.

my sister did the talking on the funeral. i did the work behind closed doors.

i just wanted to express my grattitude towards this forum and you guys. i’m kinda blocked when speaking about this, otherwise, i’d tell more.
after the working i did, my spiritual practice reached full stop. i don’t even meditate these days. i don’t feel any connection with the spirit world, and everything seems mundane as it gets.
i came back to my apartment and pressed reset button. i only look forward to complete works.


#14

Hey - your devastation is a real travesty of suffering. You could axe this ex boss of your late mothers with a devastating curse no matter what compensation is offered to you it’s blood money and worthless.

Divination to identify the cause of loss of health would be my suggestion… if the dismissal caused or helped contribute to the sudden death then this would put things into a new perspective.

Had your beloved Mother had not long to live regardless of employment or not this would alleviate the seemingly ineffective spell work.