Hello forum! This is my first real post in here, but I’ll try to keep it brief.
I’m a guy who’ve always wanted to be a girl. Due to life circumstances however, whether due to my own cowardice or whatever, “transition” in this life was never an option. We don’t have to get into the particular reasons why. Might just mention that right now I’m a fat loser, forever alone, still in the closet faggot who’s pushing 50, so please forgive me if my ambitions regarding the remainder of this earthly existence is completely zero. Think of that what you will, insult or taunt me if you wish. I don’t care.
Unlike most people therefore, I haven’t had my interest in magick and the occult peaked because of what it could do for me in the here and now, but rather entirely in relation to what it could entail in terms of the afterlife. What I wish for and desire is to become a beautiful woman in an erotic paradise hell of morbid lust and sublime perversion (the neon-light drenched 80’s edition ). Firmly settled and incarcarated therein, my sole intention is to spread and splash kinky love around, especially to those who need it, as a fully exploitabe object of pleasure, whether in the capacity of a harem slave, prostitute, luxurious lady, pimp owned street walking hooker, or whatever. It’s what my soul wants, but to realize it I need the desirable body, and the right surroundings to be in (like in my avatar). And that’s not in our world…
So I’m quite curious to see if there are others here who see magick and the occult, not to mention ritual, worship and servitude to certain entities in a similar perspective, meaning an afterlife perspective, rather than getting money, success and the fast car right now. Also, I’d love to know if any of you have any suggestions regarding what deity/being would be best to give yourself to, worship and serve in order to achieve a safe passage to the yearned for destination. Is Lilith the Mother to whom I should turn?
I’m willing to do what it takes to get there. Until then I intend continue living the quiet life I’m used to, with minimal disturbance to the set direction along a gently sloping path.