More baby steps & progress

New Magician Help & Introductions
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I’ve been continuing to lurk & read, inspired by Israel’s thread I have been working thru the 72 Goetia, had to take a break as it was the first anniversay of my mum dying and I did not want to risk talking to her, or drawing her back unintentionally.

I have not heard an actual voice since the first one, but every time I ask to “speak” with the demon (of the day) I feel my ear drums “vibrate” is if someone is screaming at me but I just not registering the sound, which is kinda annoying.

I recieved the lancettes in the post and returned to Azazel for the offering I had promised, and recieved a full sigil flashing- totally off the paper, then in 3D hovering plain as day.

During the days where I took a break I could still feel the Demons turning wheels in my life, yes, the path is the hard and fast one… I asked for help at work, so every kind of Audit possible was thrown at me in a couple of weeks - passed them all… they also help me sort my life out. I have always had depression in some for or another - not enough to stop me working, but enough that I struggle with “Impossible Tasks” and they have been helping me with this too, simple things that have always been quite literally impossible, the Demons clear the way, so that I may accomplish what i need

I hate asking spirits for money, as it is seems cliche… but reaching now a financial wall I did, and they instead of manifesting “new” money unclogged money i was due (like £20 a friend owed, or a £900 insurance cheque) and made me more aware of where I waste money…

on a purely magical side, just last night I realised that Beelzebub had been waiting quite some time to talk to me, and so I called to him, and aside from the ritual/conversation, I had the strongest manifestation as of yet. I now normally see tiny orbs when calling to spirits - not part of the static rain- but last night in the static rain a shape formed, and it stayed there for a full few seconds when I focused my eyes on it, it was only about the size of a fist, but as I titled my post … baby steps…

ah, the other good thing also, my old tarot cards have recharged. When i first picked them up they felt dead. so I reset them by putting them back in to original order, and now certain cards keep re-appearing, and have formed their own divinations not always apparent by the booklet’s given meaning.

Happy days… (thanks for reading)

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Celebrate the baby steps! These really do add up. And keep note of what’s working and what isn’t. That’s the most important thing in the beginning stages. Learn what (and who) can deliver results. It’s like buying new tools. You’ve got to try them out to figure out what the best tool for you is!

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I think i had an eye test last night :joy:

I’ve been seeing orbs, smoke without insence and thick darkness for a while … ive been asking the relevent demons to help develop my perceptions,
Well last night I xalled Belial to show his the results of his work (namely the cash we manifested) and he seemed to be in a really good mood ( - maybe they get excited too when their tinkering in our world pays off? ) and again i asked for help with percieving them…

The room i was in was unlit but with light bleeding in from the ajar door, the darkness suddenly intensified - i could feel my pupils react… “yes, i can see that” … again it dropped… i affirmed my perception… the darkness moved across the room - the light from the house unchanged ( the only other human in the house was firmly asleep & the cat has not worked out light switches yet) … this went of for about 10mins… he would move about the room altering the darkness either in large fuzzy patches or by visibly dimming the entire room.

Writing this in cold hard daylight it sounds insane! But i remember it clearly… the hardest part was not mentally coming out of the meditative state in the excitement!

Needless to say i slept like the dead :joy:

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I often forget to ground afterwards. Weither it be food or putting your feet in dirt. You dont loose the connect you are just seated in your throne.

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Good point! I think i try and encourage them in to my dreams but i am a bit lax with that stuff… will make a point of that :slight_smile: thankyou!

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I needed to talk to Azazel about the journey… hate talking money to them but recent events left me eye watering short.

Anywho i have just restocked my candle supply (have been doing darkness rituals instead) so i lit the tea candle and put it on the bed infront of me.

Meditating, focusing calling etc…
Began evoking Azazel by name, ‘suddenly’ my voice sounds odd and the air to the end of my bed looks … slightly thicker somehow. My skin prickles slightly, and i notice, the crisp shadow cast on the wall (its a smooth arc) is… fuzzy… behind the 'thicker air ’ the edge of the shadow even dissapearing (as if no light reached the wall to create the shadow at that place) .

Now i know that you eye will ignore things in peripheral vision if you stare at something enough, but this remained when i was looking straight at it…

My pre ritual tarot spred did indicate that it would go well & that my sences were kinda on form but i had been used to seeing orbs & sparks. Not sure if Azazel agreed my point or not… only time will tell!