Maybe fear is holding me back?

Hi everyone,

So I’ve posted a couple times on here a little while back about my attempts to get into contact with Belial and Lucifer (and others of the Goetia). I mediate almost daily, either laying in bed at night, or sitting in front of my candles and incense (alter) using sigils. I have never heard a response back from them, although there have been times where I have felt a strange energy, or, at night, almost a creeping electric feeling of something brushing my head/hair/back of neck.

I have been really trying and working on establishing my abilities and connections with these entities for several months, but I wonder if what is really blocking communication is fear on my end. I go and read posts in this forum and people make these entities seem funny, jolly, humorous, wise–nothing inherently bad or evil.

However, there have been times where I have felt the presence of entities or something when not trying to establish contact (like in the past when I’ve smoked or in my dreams/nightmares/trips/sleep paralysis) that feels evil. The sinister, creeping, murderous raping tortuous evil that makes me cringe in my soul type feeling.

I don’t know if those experiences were “real,” but I feel like that could be what’s holding me back from really being open to establishing contact and increasing my abilities. Any thoughts?

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Candles, sigils, all those materials are important. But don’t forget that your most important magickal “material” is your own mind. If it’s blocked, nothing will work. If fear controls you, you will only get pictures of this fear. Work on that, let it go. Free yourself from fear/doubt.


The very first time I tried to contact a spirit I got pictures of all my different fears in my head. It was a hint. I had to work on that first.

You scare me when you insinuate you use substances. You have already stated you felt evil presences when you do. So why do you?

You need to be fully in charge but surrendered naturally not chemically.

I know many people will disagree with that statement, considering a history of substances use with our species, I just don’t see how you can be better for it.

You have not really written anything in your post to suggest your’e fearful, just stop trying so hard, this should be a natural process, something that just cannot be rushed at will. Just keep at it. Stay up with research as well. Maybe try some different techniques, there’s plenty on the forum.


substances, I read over that.
I actually agree on @Aprentiz here. To me using substances feels like cheating on myself, idk.


If you are afraid of darkness, you have to become the darkness. Also, substances? Nobody needs that crap. Get in control. Free yourself.


All too true. I don’t smoke anymore, but a coupe years ago when I did use hallucinogens it did something bad to my brain and i haven’t been the same since.
But I kind of meant, those feelings and also the sinister feelings come to me st night in my dreams. I had sleep paralysis (at least I think) a couple weeks ago where I like saw/felt myself being slowly dragged/floated out of my bed by something malevolent I couldn’t see and tried to scream and I couldn’t)

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Fear can be quite the crippling force. I think mediating on those fears would be beneficial for you to move forward. In particular, mediate on the source of those fears. Was it a spirit actually doing it or is it a fear imprinted on you by the beliefs of others that let to its manifestation? The mind is extremely powerful and can do wonders or inflict great pain when not in check. Smoking can certainly amplify that if you have a negative association to it, although I would be a hypocrite by telling you to stop. These are just things to agree with.

Also, I would not try too hard to establish connect as that can be your undoing as well. Allow it to flow naturally, in the direction you are being pulled to. The experiences described here can take time, especially in the beginning. Every path is unique and follows a different pace, so follow yours accordingly.

Very true send love to the spirit they won’t hurt you they’re here to help us evolve and enlightenment and help us be awaken they’re beautiful amazing and they make me feel happy and I’m such a more calming better person and my mind and emotions are strengthen I have no fear for them but just love and respect

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I have a new update! It’s not too huge of a step, but yesterday I felt like I made some progress! I was invoking Belial and Lucifer, and the room I was sitting in (that was already dark) turned really dark for a little bit, my lamp dimmed, and it’s almost like the room took a red tint and I felt a heavy nervous energy. I tried really hard to not feel afraid, but I think focusing on remaining calm might have ruined things because it all of a sudden got lighter in the room–lighter than before

If you had a bad experience using, you most likely attracted astral parasites. They WILL scare the shit out of you to feed on that energy. They like low vibrations. The mentally ill and addicts are PLAGUED with these bloody things. If it isnt something you experience now, I wouldnt worry about it. Work on raising your vibration and know that you are a MUCH MORE powerful entity.