There comes a point in every good magicians life when he or she is so enveloped in the darkness, so advanced in the black arts that they start experiencing the really crazy shit.
Seeing things they never thought were possible before.
Hearing spirits so clearly it’s as if another human is speaking to them.
Having visions and dreams that are SO real it becomes harder to distinguish visions from reality.
Having a constant feeling of floating, as if you are detached from your body but still “in it”. Like your body is just a machine (vessel of flesh) and you can literally feel your soul as a separate entity, just floating inside of the vessel it’s contained in.
Developing Kinetic powers and things you never knew you were capable of.
Clairvoyant skills are so strong you can literally connect with any person and instantly feel their essence, their personality.
But all of this can start to make you wonder if you’re just going insane or you have just become one hell of a sorcerer.
How do some of you distinguish that line between, being powerful and connected with the source, and just being plain freaking insane? And when you find yourself staying up for 2 days straight with your head stuck in magick books and researching online non-stop like you are so thirsty for more knowledge that you literally just cannot stop.
And constantly craving MORE and MORE power, energy, and ritual. More connections with the divine! Craving to be detached from reality, disassociation. Sometimes even to the point that you become obsessed with Gods, Demons, Goddesses, anything dark, wanting to work with these entities as much as you can just so you can feel and connect with that beautifully dark and comforting energy they give off.
Craving that dark energy like a werewolf lusting after human flesh
Like a vampire thirsting after fresh type O+ human blood
Like a tiger waiting to leap out of a thicket, pouncing on its next kill
You simply can’t get enough of it. You start to feel incomplete if you are not actively doing magick and meditation, raising energy, researching, detaching yourself from your mundane reality and evoking entities 24/7.
The darkness becomes you and you become a part of it.
It is pure madness? Schizophrenia? Disassociate disorder?
Or a sign that you are truly on your way to godhood?