Lost Contact with A Spirit

Hi this is my first post, and im new to all of this, 2 months ago i decided to start working with a spirit
so i was making my first invocation, and it was to the spirit of lilith, i did my invocations to lilith because X years ago i was sleeping in the living room of my house, when i wake up i was laughing hard and it wasnt my voice was the voice of a woman, so i stop it with my will beacuse “it” wasnt stoping, and i was wondering wtf was that in all this years, and 3 months ago i heared a male voice next to me that told me “ARJDXSRD needs you” i swear i heard that and i was completely alone, soooo i decided to work with lilith because this voices, and just in case you think im sick of the mind, i have a lot of unnatural experiences in all my life. trust me a lot and 3 of them has been with people next to me. so returning to the topic
the first time that i made my invocation nothing weird happened so i quicky gave up and then i decided to sleep and when i woke up i saw a big white circle in front of me for 2 seconds and i hearded a grim scream the scream was like booa and i didnt freak up seriously, that happened for two consecutive days and i thought it was a win, at least for me and i continued with my invocations through all this days, i was ok with the results till i decided to “cum” LOL in the statue that i had for her (lilith) i did that because i was in a group of “satanic people” and they told me to do that. and i went to sleep after i cummed on the statue, and precisely in that night i had a dream, -i almost never have dreams never- and in the dream i was walking on a city and behind me was a orange haired young lady 16 yo discretly folowing me, she was hugging with some young guy when i looked behind, and she was following me all around discretly and i went mad and ran away until lost contact with… and when i lost contact a bit further some black haired lady around his 35 aproached to me and told “my feets are dirty” “clean them”, clean them with your clothes now, and i told her what?
fuck off, im not cleaning, why? why me? they are clean look at them, she was wearing sandals, and she just sighed and turned back i continued walking, and i looked behind and saw nothing, and when i woke up, i was thinking wtf was that, that city was beautiful and that was a weird dream and i saw the image of lilith and remembered what i did to her “the ritual” lol and i cleaned everything the statue was still wet soo from taht day and on i have nothing :frowning: all my invocations have failed miserably i used to feel there was something inside of me, something light inside but now nothing happens
is there a way to do something and make contact again?
english is not my native language as you can see, and i apologize for the grammar