First I wish to Thank those who have been trying to assist me in my quest. But I feel on order to understand my problem I must explain what is happening in my life, so then maybe I can get detailed assistance. Please excuse if this is too long.
I am 57 years old, and for the past 30 years I have been a practicing witch, with a specialty for potions, herbology and such. I have been teaching for the past 15 years. But for the past couple of years, it seems nothing I do comes out right, or has the opposite effect of what it is I am trying to do. My spells fail, potions spoil or go rancid, rituals have opposite effect than what is intended! And on top of all of this, I have lost the ability to visualize! I really never had a problem with this before, but it seems no matter how hard I try, I can’t seem to get into a quiet place or void. Guided meditations do not help, and neither do such things as binuaral beats, chanting, or yoga, as I have tried several versions of everything I have looked at over the past couple years. Kundalini, Tai Chi, Hatha, NOTHING! I have given each practice at least 6 months each, figuring it will take time, but it just doesn’t get me to where I feel I need to be. Maybe I am not trying the right one’s? I am not sure.
I am currently going through the process of getting rid of everything that no longer serves me, which at the present moment is my husband of 20 years, as he and I have not been right for the past 5 years. He does not approve of my practices and has done everything he can to dissuade me from it. All the mental abuse has taken its toll and I am doing my best to get rid of all the negativity and get past it.
Since he is home all the time, I have no privacy in which to do anything! Every time I try to find time for myself for personal meditation, he does what he can to interrupt me. I have even tried to go into the woods behind our house for some quiet time, but he lets our dogs loose knowing full well they will find and disrupt me! This is how bad it is with him! On top of all of this, I found out he has not been paying the bills, so when he leaves me, I am the one who will be stuck paying all the unpaid bills which now total over $2000.00! I am on disability and unable to work (Doctors orders) and I do not have a car, so I am stuck where I am at with no one to turn to. (I have no family left)
Is there anything I can do to help me get right with myself and the Cosmos? I have tried to research all the various Gods/Goddesses hoping for a glimmer of hope, but I am unsure as to how to approach them, or even which one to ask for assistance. I have always been drawn to Bune for some reason of which I am not sure, but I am not sure if even she/he can help. Would it help if I could find someone willing to give me a reading? Maybe a reading could give me direction? As I said, I cannot afford a whole lot. I would appreciate any help I can get. (My husband is due to leave in the summer, but until then, I am stuck in my current situation)
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Go to a Woman named Eve The medium.