Some of you may know that I like to give a quick backdrop and leading up to everything to give context and as much detail as possible. So, if you want to skip it i’ll put it below a line break, but I do believe it is worth reading if you have the time.
It’s currently spring break for my college and in a few days i’ll be going with my best friend to hike a small portion of the Appalachain Trail in Georgia. Until then I am with my family and staying in my old room.
Now, my parent’s house was built by them (rather they comissioned it to be done or something of the sort) so we are the first, and so far only, inhabitants of the house. There is no Indian burial ground, no murders, none of that. It’s common and cliche, but I figured i’d get it out there.
I lived in this house from roughly age 8 until when I went off to college at age 19. Nothing bad has ever happened in the house and I come from a very loving family, but I myself always went through a lot of hard times. I won’t go until detail, but it could basically amount to abuse from others that went on for years, some of it traumatizing. I would bring all of this home into my room and I would make noise music and black metal as an outlet, screaming my head off and being violent towards myself and imaginary images in my head constantly to try and keep the madness away from me.
Eventually my room became very cold, and I mean like ICEBOX cold. We’ve had the heating guys come, the electricians comes, and we have tried everything for years - my room is fucking cold as shit. Now, i’ve gotten used to this and it has made it so that i’m used to sleeping in my clothes, but as I got older I began to notice more sinister things.
I basically became afraid of my room, and until 16 I was afraid of the dark JUST in my room. I always feared of these nightmarish entities in my room and a few times when, out of desperation, I called out to them to leave the whole room would shake slightly and cracks could be heard through the walls. At night I would vividly see shadows moving throughout the room and a few times it has prompted me to scream at the top of my lungs in fear they were so thick and vivid. I’ve had the doors open and slam shut on me, my bed shake, and just more stuff.
Fast forward to tonight and ever since beginning practicing magick I have been getting better at sensing when an entity or something abnormal is in my presence. I get that whole-body tingle and those chills down my spine, but they happen over and over and for no reason other than I FEEL something here. And let me tell you, the moment I walked into my room I felt those chills like crazy. Just a few minutes ago as I was trying to sleep I vividly saw a shadow creature dart across the room at a fast walking pace and it looked humanoid with giant horns coming off of it’s back. Needless to say, the lights are now on. Call me a pussy, but my room here frightens me. I’ve called up entities (well, one in particular) in my apartment and i’ve had some of the most intense stuff happen, but this just fills me with fear and dread. As i’ve written this my bed as been shaken a few times and I am honestly contemplating sleeping on the couch.
Right before I left for college I began to see the room as. . . alive. I began to speaking to it as a person before leaving for long periods of time as if it were a person and I have no idea why. As I finish typing this I think i’m going to go sleep on the couch because I cannot stand this room it’s just downright filling me with dread. I can FEEL something in here and I am NOT liking it
So, my questions comes to this: can all the negativity that I felt, absorbed, gave off, fueled, and fed while in this room be lingering? Has it brought forth some malevolent entities of some sort? Why does just this one room, just his one room, fill me with dread and fear of the dark?
And more importantly, what can I do about this?
Thanks again so much to all of your help.