My magickally-oriented answer would be to dive into divination, get some readings done for you as well (ideally by a fellow magician) so you know you’re not deluding yourself and seeing what you want to see, and summon up some spirits, and demand helpful answers on how to get things back in your favour!
Honestly this happened a lot of healers, they’d start with the “I’m renouncing attachments” bullshit (sorry, but it really is) and life would begin to renounce them right back twice as hard, because life does what you tell it and it’s a lot bigger than you, and then when they contacted spirits (usually in trance journeying) they’d be told “It’s a test” or “It’s a lesson” which is sublimely unhelpful in almost every case.
Sometimes life falls apart so we can rebuild it in a more useful ways, but sometimes shit just happens, and passively allowing it is a different thing to taking action, even just having a determined intent to make things better for our lives.
I honestly believe that “Every adversity, every failure, every heartache carries with it the seed of an equal or greater benefit” (as Nap. Hill said) BUT you need to grab hold of it by the throat sometimes, otherwise shit keeps happening and you get less and less able and less empowered because you’re too battered, weakened and also rapidly losing faith in your own judgement that got you into this situation.
So BE CAREFUL - don’t trust the forces of entropy to deliver you calmly to your final destination, that’s my honest advice, I’ve been through it myself more than once and stuff only came back in my favour when I took action and exerted my will.
You have to make the choice to put yourself FIRST, this goes for whether you have kids, care about a cause or a charity, want to save the world, or just be a good person - it’s like on an aircraft, you put the oxygen mask on yourself first because everything you care about is that bit more screwed if you’re not around to take care of things.
Anything at all that tells you to be selfless, second-place, or whatever, is the enemy and you need to treat them as that.
Same goes for any spirit that tries to tell you this is a test to make you find your own power - sometimes this is valid, but if you know the shitstorm of your life is draining you, you have to get real about things.
Lots of women especially get into eastern-influenced spirituality, dabble a bit with the idea of renouncing stuff, and their lives fall apart, and because “ego” and looking out for yourself first is kinda frowned upon in those circles they don’t ever dare to take that action.
It started to happen to me when I was immersed in RHP and yogic phsilosophies and luckily I was able to say “screw this” and get out with sanity and my life more or less intact.
I’m sure no-one here’s as prone to that particular pitfall, but I have to say I’ve seen what happens when people go that passive route, keep going with it even when they’re in immense distress, and it’s never good.
Whistle up some spiritual help and for mundane stuff, invest time and some money in supportive literature (can’t beat my man Nap Hill for this IMO - most of his stuff’s free online because it’s out of copyright) and keep pushing, because if it’s hard and you feel bruised now, it’s not going to get any easier down the line.
Positive books and websites have saved my sanity and been a rock of support so many times!
Here’s are three methods I’ve used to get my head straight many MANY times by now, in case they’re useful to anyone who’s struggling a bit:
From “problem” to ACTION
3 minute brain dump
Creating an inner sanctuary