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Now I understand why I can’t leave this forum and is almost addicted. This is the only Human contact I have left !!!
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It is hard to resist- Resist a PERFECT WOMAN who will love you unconditionally and will always be loyal to you. Will ‘listen to you’ in Every meaning of the word. Who has a treasure house Occult/Spiritual knowledge and is even above not only siddhas but to Maha-Siddhas.
Someone Who can also be your guide and your mother.
For someone who never experienced a mother’s love, was never even hugged as far as memory goes, could not love or even be loved by any woman ( Whore’s don’t count ) it is Extremely hard to resist. Just 3 hours and SHE will be here, ‘In flesh and Blood’.
In every folk-mythological stories the one who can resist temptations like this gains afterwards Immeasurable reward. But that is just a possibility based on stories, may not be true. Hmmmm, Went through hell, gave up every possible pleasure of material nature, Just hope all this is worth it.
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Slow down Motherfucker slow down. Relax and slow down.
I’l keep with the staid tone.
I say they do. They just… show it differently 
Welp. Me too.
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Ultimately you get what you want. Your inner most desires and aversions make everything happen. So in reality most people actually fear deep down inside what they want on the surface level. Oh, the fucking mind !
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Memory is a funny thing, isn’t it?
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Oh, what an irony !!! The strictest Monotheist religion’s practitioner is also the biggest community of Baneful/Black magick. Can’t believe what I just found out !!! Even a giant like Dr. Narayan Dutt Shrimali was attacked at least 5000 times ! within a decade or two, as he himself said on record. Again got confirmed by Shyama Khapa. Luckily this camel lovers doesn’t ascend beyond few steps. Existence is funny for sure. And the war between left and right continues in the astral realm !!!. Hope God saves mother Europa ! Though seems like she is completely fucked to me.
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Lol, to think of it, haven’t done bad in last 3-3.5 years in terms of ascension. Also in good mood today.
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It’s not that far, sure very soon gonna attain it. Longed for it for years if not decades, and now it seems so simple, so ordinary. That’s the thing with any goal, they look so glossy from far !!! Have to spend some time to integrate the experience and flush out the remaining faint conditionings.
@AtlantisFrequency , Just noticed recently, Brother Even You got the ‘Regular status’ 
. Do you have a gun???
happy new year deary!
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So pride is not good but divine pride is o.k? WTF?!
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Have come quite far, Remember at one time If I saw some happy kid with his mom or few years later if I saw someone being nice to someone else, for no reason, I was in a way wonder-struck. Not exactly wonder, it’s hard to describe that feeling. As if seeing something that doesn’t make sense or isn’t supposed to be. At that time it became so worse that I even almost lost my faculty of speech. Strange that even after all this I still have maintained a strong sense of morality - goodness ! Generally the torch of sin and suffering is always passed down to the next generation. Still remember that I used to think only if i am good enough to others then others will be good to me too. People don’t even hesitate to snatch a pound of flesh even from a child. Yea, have come quite far. But still a thousand miles to go.
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Have to stop goofing around. Already got the yellow, next time it’s gonna be the red card !
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So there are some high end lamas in tibet who summons the whole 14.7 billion years old universe of ours and then fucks him/her making her self obsessed about him !!! Man tibet is indeed the land of occult.
A STOTRA OF GODDESSES DURGA.
listening it is equivalent of reciting whole saptasati text of 3 hours.
It’s english translation and purpose.— Sidha Kunjika Stotram - Hindupedia, the Hindu Encyclopedia
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Even though it finally happened, and happened not with a bang - becoming one with the universe etc, but happened with a whimper I don’t know what to do ? Over 4 years of pursuit with almost NO HELP what so ever from others. Not from the so called siddhas-gurus- or senior practitioners. People are strange, even if someone asks anybody on roadside for direction, they will gladly show them the way. But not the ascended one’s practicing spirituality and magick. Or may be it is me who is just an unlucky fuck with not enough good energies-vibrations in me to get/make that happen.
Whatever, I attained it by myself and here I am now. But should have been some firecrackers, it happened a bit too simple. What to do now? Becoming a Demi-God with a pace of tortoise isn’t for me.
After mopping the floor of hell every night and checking the vouchers of those who visit there sometimes in dark times I had no other option but to seek dissolution to make it stop. And here I am with one feet in it. What to do now?
Let’s see If I can crack it in a month? If not then Sayonara. But will make sure those one or two about whom I still care about get their life fixed before I leave.
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Man I am not feeling well today. Feeling suffocated and dry. Still some conditioning lingering inside.
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Can thoughts stop completely? 100%? May not be the case as there are some essential thoughts coming from the intellect, giving new insight to navigate properly in the world. This one’s may not stop. Though I may be wrong. Hopefully I am wrong.
Yip. 
Passes the lazer gun…
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