Journal : Dreams

[Sovereignty]

My emotions are volatile as ever.

I am still seeing angel numbers, I simply ignore them now.

One of my peers was angry today, I felt his anger on my skin(he was standing infront of me with his back faced to me), it was hot. Like a fire being held about 3 inches away from my hand.

Now I’m obsessed with bows and arrows, also guns(mind you, I don’t own any of these, I do not recommend owning these for fun, I do not encourage these (Just incase a mod’s reading this) ), I receive visions of myself holding a gun and firing with perfect aim. Same with the bow and arrow.

I can barely remember the last time I had a dream, thanks to Lilith I’ve been having very peaceful sleep.

[Sovereignty]

Started seeing a little too much in my peripheral vision at my home, did banishing with just words.

As I spoke, I felt goosebumps.

I don’t know if this was my imagination, but I "saw’ flashes of strange creatures.

I’ll tell you one: One had circular red things in the place of eyes and had full white skin, it was standing directly infront of me.

Opened the windows, I guess it’s alright now.

Gotta take a look at how to set up wards, according to a post I read, banishing is the easiest part but making sure they do not return is more important.

Edit: I found a warding technique that uses visualizing strong mirrors to “reflect” off negative energy and uninvited parasites. Began laughing like a maniac after the ritual, my feet feel a little chilly.

[Sovereignty]

Had quite an incident today.

A colleague today thought I hadn’t handed in work today, and said, “No, [my name], I hadn’t received it yet.”

I was quite confused, then she checked, and affirmed that I actually had handed my work in. She then apologized handsomely and said she would pay for my lunch today, which I obviously refused.

However, paying no heed to my words, at lunchtime, she paid for my meal at the moment I was about to pay for my meal. I fought (not literally, bold of you to assume I would tackle a woman to the floor) and told her not to do so, but in the end, she ended up paying, and once again, apologized.

I don’t understand, what was so severe that she had to pay for my lunch? Huh???

Anyway, I am still getting bombarded with angel numbers, I think the wards I set up had created some sort of “glamour magick” on me, women were giggling at me, people were staring at me… yeah.

No dreams I can recall! I’m finally having some peaceful deep sleep without dreams.

[Sovereignty]

Great, I’ve been waiting for hours for the forum to load.

For some reason, it wouldn’t do so.

Anyways, Not much to say about dreams.

I redid the mirror wards today.

I can tell by the way people look at me that it has an effect by itself.

Anyways, it’s time I get some sleep.

[Sovereignty]

I know realise that these urges to own a sword has expanded to all kinds of weapons, including bare fists.

Sometimes (even as I’m typing this), I feel like grabbing a spear and impaling an enemy on the floor. It’s full of emotion and a kind of “tyranny”, as I describe it.

Other times, it’s swords, urges to own one and slash at the air.

Then it’s bows and arrows, aiming at a target and releasing the arrow.

Even guns, I get visuals of aiming and firing perfectly between the eyebrows and the center of the forehead.

I’ve been taking a break from doing 100 repetitions of the mantra given by Fastos and Meton for astral senses because there’s I’m really busy nowadays, wake up at 6.30am (Not at all a pleasant time to wake up) and return home at 4.30pm.

I’ve been slacking, haven’t I?

I might as well do it now then grab a hearty lunch, probably go and sleep.

[Sovereignty]

I have been slacking.

I haven’t been training astral senses properly.

Fie on me! A man who desires to become a living god yet isn’t working on it.

Perhaps I’m being too harsh on myself. I do have quite a busy life.

I should sleep, I’m probably too tired.

[Sovereignty]

Had a dream where I was travelling with some strange family in a toyota vellfire.

There was some sort of entity which looked strange, it seemed like some sort of “cyber” monster, that’s the best I can describe it.

For whatever fucking reason, a baby in the front seat started trying to talk, and the creature heard it, and was coming back.

But somehow, it ignored us and went in another direction.

Here the dream cut, and I was in a place that I do not know.

Over there, for whatever reason, I stapled a stapler pin into my knee.

Why? I know not.

I was panicking in that dream, thinking, “Will I have to somehow rip this off with my skin?”

Then I flexed my quads, and somehow, the stapler pin straightened, allowing me to pull it out in a straightforward manner.

But when I pulled it out, I was bleeding profusely.

I was despairing at it.

That’s all I remember.

[Sovereignty]

I got yet another dream, this time it was a sort of fight, that’s the best I can describe it and remember of it.

(Not in the dream, not after waking up, it’s nighttime for me here) I felt intense predatory energy coursing though my veins. I slashed, ripped, and bit (yes, bit) at the air.

I was laughing (and still am laughing) and smiling like a psycho, perhaps it’s a sort of banishing(?)

I know not what this means, perhaps there’s some bullshit trying to invade my space, and I instinctively let my animalistic side take over?

Whatever.

Has the night always looked this beautiful? I’m in love with it. The sky is so beautiful, dark blue, mist, rain, yeah.

[Sovereignty]

Humans with too much free time… disappointing.

I’ll just go to bed.

[Sovereignty]

Nowadays I seem to love silence.

It’s so peaceful, so addictive (in a good way). The night sky is so beautiful.

I’m sure I had a dream last night, can’t seem to remember it at all.

I should probably get back to powerlifting, a one year hiatus is quite a long time to rest.

[Sovereignty]

Experimenting with a sigil, will see how it works tomorrow.

Goodnight, all!

[Sovereignty]

Fucking hell, I messed it up. My first time dealing with a parasite.

A fucking astral parasite almost made me lose my fucking mind this morning.

I tried to banish it with words, but I don’t know where the fuck did my authority and anger go. It didn’t leave at first.

I asked Lilith to get rid of that astral piece of shit, but Lilith just said, “Go deal with it yourself.” Typical Lilith behaviour…

Anyways, I was not at all pleased at the moment, but I thank her for doing so now, because I learned how to banish a parasite.

I chuckled a little, and felt some goosebumps. Instantly, I remembered that laughter is banishing! I laughed like a maniac, and said, “You’re just making a fool of yourself, just leave before you make things more embarassing for yourself” to the parasite.

In about 1-2 minutes, it left.

Just had a shower, visualized the slimy garbage left behind by it washed away.

The only reason why it managed to attack me is because I’ve been slacking on wards. I didn’t perform my mirror wards in more than 2 days.

Thankfully, I found the time to remake my mirror wards, I’m fine now.

Also, I ripped the sigil into small pieces and threw it in the dustbin.

Learned alot, Thank you Lilith, O my matron.

[Caessium]

How did you figure out you were dealing with a parasite?

[Sovereignty]

I felt agitated, my heart was beating fast, I was feeling nervous and drained.

[Sovereignty]

Played badminton flawlessly today!

Had a dream…

Me, my mother, and my stepfather were in some massive hindu temple (why…?), in the temple there was a massive statue of lord Shiva, in his “Nataraja” form.

I did not bother worshipping it, obviously.

My mother was worshipping that statue and was walking around the statue.

Just me and my stepfather were standing infront of the statue, around 20 feet away from it. That statue had to be around 80 feet tall.

He turned to me and asked, “Do you want me to make the lights in [somewhere, I can’t remember] black out?”

Then the dream ended.

I honestly can’t seem to interpret this, it makes nearly no sense.

[Sovereignty]

Was reading this post of DarkestKnight when I tasted wine on my tongue.

5 Days, 5 Spirits, 5 Q&A's

Okay, last night I did another Q&A. This one was very interesting, as I definitely did not get what I expected. Also, some personal stuff was revealed to me that I have decided to share for your edification. 4: Lilith Same altar arrangement as usual, facing South within my UC. I used two red candles for this one, plus my scrying bowl. Entered an altered state through my usual meditations. The sigil I used was the triangular one posted to the forum by DouglasCameronFuego. I gazed at the sigil and chanted the Summoning of All Magical Powers incantation. The sigil seemed flat, no response at all. After 9 repetitions of the incantation, I stopped and focused on my breath for a few moments. i started chanting the incantation again, another 9 times. This time, the sigil started waking up. It was very gradual, though, almost like slow motion. Instead of the flashing or 3D effect, the iris of the eye in the middle of the sigil seemed to spiral open. I called out, “I call thee, Lilith, Goddess of the Night, to come and appear before me, in beholdable form, and to speak to me in a clear voice I can understand. Lilith, come!” I repeated the words, while continuing to gaze at the sigil. I didn’t feel anything, no sense of presence at all. I didn’t sense anything building either. Then I heard, “I am here, sweet one,” followed by laughter. It was like nothing was there, and then suddenly, this voice spoke. I paused, reaching out with my senses for a sign of her energy or presence.…

I have not drunk wine in what? 8 months? Suddenly, I can literally taste wine on my fucking tongue! What?! Even as I write this, I can taste it so vividly!

Anyways, I’m back to powerlifting. Quite bad compared to my prime (It’s been over 1 year since I’ve trained). But with consistency, comes huge results.

I’ve been slacking on astral sense training, I better get serious.