Hello everyone! As the rules demand, here is my short introduction.
I’m a long-time meditator, but a failed magician. Have studied and practiced uncountable systems of magic, but not able to change or influence anything according to my will by means not know by science. I had good experiences with meditation, though! Hope to learn from you guys! Thank you!

Welcome to the forum. How old are you may I ask. I am in California USA. I see you have not read much on the forum since you joined 6 months ago.
What is it exactly your joined to learn and

That suggests to me that you are having trouble focusing, nothing to do with the lack of magickal ability. How deep did you actually go in any of those systems? and be honest, because we will know LOL

I’m in my 40’s.

How deep is difficult to assess, but let me give some ideas of some systems I’ve practiced.

Goetia: it was like studying, gathering all the instruments, banishing and consecrating them, doing several evocations in a row (along 2 months or so) without any results, studying again, evoking again, pausing for lack of results, resuming, pausing…

Grimoire NAP - New Avatar Power - don’t remember for how long I practiced it, perhaps I have the notes on my journal, but not willing to search now.

Christian magic - like prayer, candles, etc. I’ve prayed for so many years without any results, that nowadays I have to force myself to pray, because I feel ridiculous! :wink:

Sorcery - tried many spells along my life too.

Talismans – some consecrated by me and some by magicians.

Chaos Magick – servitors created by me and public ones. Time here doesn’t count; this is one of the reasons they call it Chaos Magick :wink: .

Radionics - Studied, purchased and used some devices.

Divination (Tarot) - studied for a long time, practiced, learned the meaning of the cards (love the tarot, as each card is a piece of art and a portal for knowledge and power), but my readings don’t make sense.

Hired the famous priestess Akelta Wilde to do a spiritual surgery in partnership with Lord Uphir to open my third eye. I saw amazing reviews about it, but it never worked for me.

Hired some sorcerers to bind companion spirits to me, but either it never worked or I don’t have the astral senses to see the spirits (even trying hard).

Hired magicians to cast spells on me.

And the list goes on… you name it.

I’m not totally frustrated though, as a long ago I had some experiences communicating with spirits, when I was very energy sensitive, which came from my meditations, but it’s long gone. I keep meditation daily, though and like it as it still brings me some blissful weaves (every now and then) and a calmer mind. Plus, I’ve seen some people performing and many testimonials of magic. Thus, I know that magick is the real deal.

My interest is to learn anything that works ;-). More specifically, I’m interested mainly in things like opening my astral senses, evocation, getting a spirit guide and stuff like that! From that on I know that the doors start to open.

Courses and books alone haven’t worked for me. I’m more interested in having a very committed mentor (accepting suggestions), because I had some teachers who taught me techniques that I practiced diligently, they didn’t work and the teachers didn’t care either, since they already had my money.