Im a 18 y/o from Germany and i just stumbled across this forum today.
Now let me just get started right away: I had a pretty normal upbringing. My father is catholic (atleast on paper he isn’t religious) and my mother is Protestant. Until I was probably like 14 or something I did believe in god and angels and all that but as I began to delve more and more into science I abandoned my faith.
Yet and still I have this feeling that there are greater powers at work and I really want that to be true.
The important part
Anyways let’s get to the main point.
In the recent months I, for reasons unknown, got really interested in pagan religions (especially those mentioned in the Bible) and also hermetics and magic.
The religion that intrigued me the most was that of the ancient canaanite people (later phonecians/carthaginians).
Something about their idols just awed me.
Here comes the scary part though.
And I’m not just saying that, it truly scares me.
Some of you may be familiar with the Canaanite god MOLOCH or MOLECH or whatever.
For some reason, this god occupies my mind 24/7. when I watch television, the image of his idol where the canaanites burned their children to him just pops up in my mind. And not as a idea…but as a image. Also I sometimes catch myself saying his name out loud without any context.
I was wondering if any of y’all had similar situations in their lives and I really need some people to talk to about that since I’m beginning to feel like loosing control.
Thank you all in advance and I hope the sun is shining where you live just as much as it is shining where I am right now (Ik I’m a bit weird sorry)