Influence a child's behavior to bring peace

My youngest child has a horrible attitude. He can be mean with his words, acts bothered by everyone, started to get involved with kids who are very mischevious ( and don’t give a shit about him or him getting in trouble). He has no respect for me and seems to never be happy. I have had several talks with him, attempted to get him to open up about his feelings and tried to sort out if he’s depressed. He won’t talk to me insists nothing is wrong and is just all around hard to be around.

What demons / rituals can I call upon to bring peace and harmony back into my home where he will be easier to be around and become a happy kid? He’s 12 going on 13 and I know some responses will involve this as being normal pre-teen behaviour but I see it as part of a bigger issue where he is growing into an intolerable and unbearable human being to be around.

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I would look at yourself and the other parent first. It is common that children embody our shadow aspects but lack the socio-emotional maturity to conceal behaviors that are not socially acceptable. I had the situation with a dear friend of mine when I was 14 he was a notorious cheater for no obvious reason till 8 years later he discovered that his dad cheated on his mom the whole time

Look at what type of individual you are attracted to. Do you like the bad boy type? Well, than your son might simple try to become a version that is attractive to you (woman equal to you).

Second, demanding a happy kid is toxic. Kids are not supposed to be what you wish them to be, they are supposed to grow and discover. Let your kid explain what bothers him without a filter, without threats of any kind. Let him explain his desire and behavior.

Third cut the mischievous people out of his life. If he doesn’t accept it drive with him to the local drug area and show him what it leads him to. If he desires to be a criminal drive him to mansions and tell him that this is the career path of the white color criminals.

Being bothered by everyone is usually a sign that he is having difficulty resolving something/ feels not understood.

I would abstain from magical work on children because it often backfires even the GoM warn not to perform magick on children.

You may also look into his nutrition as this can be source of major unhappiness.

Please, don’t think that I try to say that you are a bad parent or anything, because you clearly are not. You are caring. What I try to do is to give you things that worked out for me.

I hope that helped.

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I would not “make” your child do things that could interrupt its natural development (look up “teen brain development”). Your child is also in a delicate and necessary process of finding out “who” he is in this world and what he wants out of it. This stage sucks but altering it to your liking could cause a severe psychological damage in his later adult life.

I would actually suggest to call on any deity that deals with motherhood (for example like Demeter) to smoothen your relationship to your child from the motherly perspective. You can’t force him to open up (children will always have secrets from their parents) but you can influence how much he is willing to simply trust you. Connecting to your “motherly” aspect through such a deity/spirit/demon could also make you look at certain things in a more relaxed way without losing your alertness/sensitivity to changes in your child.

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Good advice! I appreciate it.

I’m single and I’m not attracted to the bad boy type. I’m not even dating at this time and I don’t even bring men I date around my kids. His father is a narcissist however. I have worked very hard to buffer and protect him from his dad by offering a completely different environment and home that is different from what he gets with his father (we divorced 8 years ago but have joint custody). While this approach was greatly successful with his older brother who is off to college, the last couple of years with my youngest has gradually become insufferable. I’m at my wit’s end which is why I have sought counsel here. And when I say I want him to be happy, I do want him to be naturally happy and want to help remove any personal internal obstacles he may have inside that are blocking him from achieving being his best self. With his resistance to be vulnerable and talk, I am greatly hindered in counseling him through it.

I did cut the mischievious kids out but school is about to start again soon so we will see how well that holds.

Wow…Thank you for offering a different perspective to the approach. While I don’t want to “change” him, I wasn’t really thinking outside the box for other approaches. I’m glad you responded. Thank you!

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In Kabbalah we believe that every kid gets a spiritual garment by their parents during their birth. May I ask how the birthing process was for your two boys?

Also your ex partners tendencies might explain why your son develops the way he develops right now.

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Maybe there is also a way to provide your son with a group of new friends that have a positive influence on him along the way. Does he have any interests that would invite group activities with other kids? (maybe he likes sports or art or is a science crack or maybe he would enjoy to learn something new like a language, an instrument or any other kind of hobby). I could think of Amon for connecting him with other people through his reconciliation abilities, for example. If you’re concerned that he gets caught up with a toxic mentality from his peers you could try to switch out the people he is currently hanging with. (that won’t keep him out of trouble, but drawing from different positive examples around him might help to enrich his integrity)

(for me, Orobas has helped behind the scenes to connect someone with “social difficulties” to a new group of people with similar interests)

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I have a 10yr old that will be 11 in the fall. He has Autism and his actions can be interpreted as disrespectful because he has a tough time interacting with people socially. It was horrible when he was younger and until he was diagnosed with Autism, I didn’t understand why he did the things he did. Lately he’s developed a rather entitled, cocky and disrespectful attitude. I tell him to do something and he rolls his eyes and complains. At first I would get defensive and felt like he was challenging my authority as a mom, but had to put myself into his little mind and had to explain to him that look kid, I know you don’t like taking out the trash or (insert chore or task here) but I’m asking you to do it as your way to contribute around the house and because we all have responsibilities. I stopped seeing him as something I controlled, and started seeing him along with my other kids as little beings with their own thoughts and emotions. This helped me better parent them.

Also, my 10yr old would start displaying signs that he needed me more because he would start asking me questions, like questions he already knew the answer to, he would hang out with me more, show more interest in the things I liked etc. if I didn’t show him the attention he needed he became disrespectful and would talk back, but since he has Autism, he couldn’t effectively tell me he wanted more of my time. I had to figure it out and explain to him that I’m not trying to ignore him or intentionally make him feel like he’s left out. A side note, I’m a disabled Veteran and have a great deal of mental trauma & mental issues so some days are good, some are crippling to the point where I get withdrawn and isolate myself. I’m still available but I just get quiet.

After seeing how this was affecting him I had to force myself to be more available for him and I also had to stop looking at what was wrong with him and start looking at what was RIGHT about him. I started praising him more when he did something nice for his siblings or when he took it upon himself to do his chores without me or his dad telling him to. When he gets angry or upset, I take him aside and tell him while he’s allowed to be angry or whatever emotion he’a feeling, he’s not allowed to be disrespectful, then I just sit and let him talk it out.

I say all of that to say sometimes we as parents have to look at ourselves to see if anything we’re doing, whether intentional or not, is causing our kids to act out in defiance. Maybe take him out by himself if you’re able and buy him his favorite meal or get him a nice t-shirt or something, talk him him mom to son, ask him about some of his interests, if he likes video games, take a moment to watch him play his favorite game or watch an episode of his favorite show with him. thank him for the things he does, even if in the back of your mind you feel you shouldn’t have to. Remember, even though he’s 12, he’s still just a kid. He may be seeking something in those kids he’s not getting at home.

As far as spirits, I call on Erzuli Dantor to protect my babies because she’s a fierce protector of mommies and children. I also created a servitor to help guide my babies.

There’s no handbook for parenting, so we all need to give each other a helping hand when we need it. I hope I was of some help, I tend to be all over the place sometimes when explaining things.

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Birth for my first was tough. I was in labor off and on for 3 days before an emergency c section. I had c sections for both but with my youngest, his was planned.

I am worried about the influence my ex partner. When he was younger, when he was more vocal and open to talking, he made it clear he does not like his dad, nor does he like going to his house. As time has progressed, instead of talking, he just lashes out with an attitude.

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But wouldn’t that just be frustration on his part? Like having to uphold the connection without necessarily having a desire for it?

You may also want to consider that your youngest just picked your ex partner as a role model based on perceived social value and accomplishment. It is not uncommon for narcissists to be really successful.

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Ugh I know. I have picked up on everything you are speaking to. I appreciate you pointing these things out to make me more cognizant and to map out my next steps!

Thank you for your vulnerability. I appreciate your comment and it has made me dig deeper into what I can do better for myself as a parent and what I can reflect outward in a better to him. I really feel like we are just hitting a rough patch in growth but its just been a downward turn. Things will get better!

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Archangel Metatron is said to have powers to help with parenting.

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Eisnuch from “The 84 genies of power”:
“If you would like to strengthen and nurture any relationship in your life to make it healthy and long-lasting then call upon Eisnuch. She will strengthen the two-way bond in any relationship. If you feel neglected or underappreciated, she can correct this”

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I have not worked directly with Metatron so this worth looking into.

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I have this book and haven’t dived deep into it. Its amazing to me how you can read a whole book and overlook aspects of what is offered since that is not the need you originally were searching for. I would have never considered this book again without you mentioning it. Thank you!

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I cnt remember the ritual I did for a hiperact kid I mean hiperact af, I did get his stone birth lavender, mandarin oil,and juniper for calm and peace a light blue candle on top g his picture I call a angel ,and say my petition ,after 4 days kid slowly down got so nice and educated his background was gang and smoke herbs,so he chance slowly,after a few weeks new kid,but was thought ,never think someone ask for tat issue,

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The power I mentioned is from Archangels of Magick by Damon Brand

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