Immersion

I’m loving this immersion stage of learning so much! The very first time I called the demons for each element Leviathan glided into view and hasn’t left for days. First feeling so very feminine and gentle and then masculine and DEEP. Like patient but also as if the weight of the world was nothing to Them.
Gliding in and out of my mind with long dark hair.
I followed the call to study Lucifer which brought me to BALG, S Connolly, Demonolatry and so many things I didn’t know I was missing.
Following that brought me to Belial!
Following Belial has brought me to Leviathan.
I will keep studying, copying sigils, reciting enns, and offering time/poetry/baked goods/rum for now.

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Since the 22nd (Day 1 of an 8 day self initiation and dedication) my life has already changed so much.
Just my internal focus has shifted, and I’ve identified the main couple blockages I still had remaining.
My spirit feels more clear and light, I feel more in tune.
Hail Lucifer!
Hail Lilith!
Hail Belial!
Hail Leviathan!
Hail Hekate!
Hail Gargophias!
Hail Ronove!
Hail Sallos!

A little update! I received two readings from V.K. Jehannum, and they hit me dead in the heart lol. I’m not yet supposed to share everything. I cannot wait to share more after my dedication and self-initiation in a few days. But one of the most exciting things was the confirmation of Lilith as my Matron!!! The day prior to the reading I went to my astral temple, and Lilith’s sigil was on the floor.

Lilith has been with me my whole life, and has been patiently guiding me to Her more and more since I was 19. She patiently waited while I continued to work on healing myself, and she led me to other Goddesses. She helped me to create my own style and trust in self before I started to study the LHP or Demonolatry.

In the month I’ve dedicated myself to this, I feel like I’ve already grown and changed. I am seeing and hearing more clearly. I feel surrounded by a love or concern I didn’t think was possible. I feel spiritually supported more than ever! Which is saying something.
Connecting to the LHP has helped open me up to senses i haven’t used in a while. I feel a connection to the forest deeper than any I’ve felt in 6 or 7 years. I understand my path up to this point more clearly than ever!

I feel like I’m home. It might sound silly, but it’s true. When I performed my self-death a handful of months back, the home I went to was an Abyssal Void. It wasn’t the flowers or fields my godmother saw or experiences of a friend who I celebrated the ritual for. My death was dark dark and the home-peace I came to at the bottom of it was like obsidian glass…and it was the most comforting thing of all time. The pure nothingness and everything seething around me yet silent and still.

Studying this stuff, following my heart, it’s unreal.

I am so glad.

Hail Lilith, always.