I'd like to identify the problem

Before I posted on this night club I go to called QXT.

It’s not a bad place, but I get very insecure when I go. My goal in said post was to get advice on how to get over those anxieties. Now I want to identify what causes them in the first place. Why do I feel this way when I go but others don’t.

My first question would be why do you go there? Drink, dance, pick up women etc. ?
Alot of anxiety stems from self confidence, primarily when our self confidence is based upon other people’s perceptions of us. This can be anxiety over failure to live up to the expectations of others or simply anxiety of the unknown ( concern about not being able to cope with an unknown situation ). Alot of people can feel mild anxiety, in the form of anticipation. My advice would be to stick with it and learn to approach the anxiety as anticipation rather than concern.
You mentioned in another thread that you have autism. I’m not that up on the literature discussing autism, but it’s entirely possible that it is playing a role in your anxiety as well.

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Autism by its self does not cause anxiety. I don’t think. It does however make you sensitive to sensory, which there is plenty of to overwhelm you. Though, I believe this can be remedied by exposure. I used to listen to hip hop and now metal. I’ve managed to decrease my sensitivity a good bit.

As for why I go, I’d say all of the above. But the main reason is to be open to new experiences. I want to be challenged. I want my life to be filled with adventure.


I suppose probably the best advice is to keep at it. You could also consider undergoing a mild spiritual possession before setting off.
A possession could grant you a bit more confidence and help her you used to feeling comfortable in that environment. Getting it straight in your head is half the battle after all

I’m currently collecting items to planetary rituals to Venus and Mercury for sociability and attractiveness. I’m currently not doing anything lhp right now till I feel more confident with the lighter stuff. It’s just easier to follow.

I found a karaoke club near by. I agree, I might be putting too much emphasis on how others see me. Because of which, I might be holding myself back. So I’m thinking that if I can periodically put myself in the spot light, I can get over myself. I’m thinking about saying to the crowd “This goes out to a special lady in the crowd. You know who you are.” Course I won’t know anyone. Then sing Tears of a Clown.

I also thought about wearing a rooster shirt and hit on girls with chicken puns.

“Hey girl. I see you chicken me out.”

“I’m just an egg head looking to get laid.”

“I’m here to strut my stuff and shake my tail feathers.”

“I’m sorry miss. I didn’t mean to ruffle your feathers.”

“Sorry about any fowl play.”

“I’m gonna fly the coup.”

“Omelet it go.”


Yeah… don’t do that. The rest sounds good, but don’t do that


Can’t take myself too seriously.

I love the image of you going round with a rooster shirt telling dad jokes :joy:

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If I’m gonna make a fool of myself, might as well have fun with it.

You never know, you might be able to pull it off. Silly stuff like that just kinda works for some people. Alot of it is down to how you look and carry yourself


Do you work out? Your bodily posture and feeling of yourself as someone with worth could be improved by this perhaps? I don’t “know” you so apologies if you covered this elsewhere, and yes, it is a mundane solution, but one with spiritual overlaps insofar as a strong body can help with energy, and the myriand tiny battles you will fight and win against weakness will improve your self-belief and self-respect.

There are loads of “prison cell workouts” and bodyweight exercises readily available online so gym membership etc is NOT a pre-requisite.

I go to a personal trainer for 1 hour three times a weak, tae kwon do two times a week, and I go to the gym when I feel like. Just not when it’s below 30 like its been these last few days.

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How do you feel about these, is there anything you can take from the personal accomplishment and patch over into your other self-image things?

If you are going to use Venus you have to understand that Venus do not approach to people, people approachs to “her” so you can use Venus to enhance your charms so people get more interest in you, not for you to approach people.
as for mercury, is good as for social skills so it would’t be bad at all

but I think you should try working with Mars so “he” will give you courage and impulse to do whatever you want, without worrying about the consequences to let your true self go out and play, there will be people who will dislike you, but you will find people who will like your true nature coming out, so I think it would be best

I would also recommend you to work very carefully with Neptune as “he” stand for the deep soul connections between all of us.

I asked my cards
they point out your situation, too much struggle with not or few results, you are not being or feeling welcomed, and there’s no retribution, you aren’t giving nor reciving anything from this, so I asked for the solution to your problem:
Page of Wands = you have to be more charismatic (venus) you need to be more brave to have courage (mars), you must be more confident (mars)

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I read somewhere that confidence can be gained through exposure. Whether it be to rejection or putting one’s self out there. Eventually you find you have nothing to lose and you begin to not care anymore. That’s my theory anyway.


Anxiety doesn’t or shouldn’t always be a negative thing but an over abundance is what causes problems. Think of anxiousness: for example as a child you’re anxious for Christmas because it’s exciting but so much so that it is causing you grief.

This is a new experience for you and of course you’ll be somewhat anxious. You want to be prepared to respond properly and blend in. That’s entirely normal.

My own opinion is that in our society we are forced to do a lot of things we don’t want to - or made to believe we have to in order to be accepted. This creates tons of anxiety because we’re always preparing ourselves on the inside. If you ask your elders they lived in a time when they may have had more struggles but they had less anxiety. I believe it’s the expectations set out for us and constantly pushed onto us even subliminally.

Then when you find yourself in a situation such as yours, what you would normally experience as an exciting and good anxiousness, you’re unable to separate from debilitating anxiety.

Does that make sense?

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