I’ve made a new list to cope, is this alright?

Everything in your list works.

If I were you, hold on with all your might on each of your sentences, get your hopes up because nobody can do it for you but you.

If it makes you feel relieved, stronger and calmer then do it.

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Hi @anon10524665 , I finally found out why I almost act out on my unpleasant feelings and anxiety , because my mind and body thinks that’s the only choice to be relieved , just an update , if you’re still around

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Good, now that you know that you can start using that to calm yourself down.

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I can’t be immediately relieved but I will find a spirit for it, until I can do it myself independently, I’m using your orb method as well

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Bump. May I know what’s correct and incorrect on any of my coping sentences? Sorry for being a pain, I’m working intensely on them

Don’t worry man I’ve also had major intrusive thoughts when I started out. They don’t become reality, you don’t need to worry. It gets better over time once you realize that. Sometimes even during a ritual there would be points where I’m gazing at a sigil and my intrusive thoughts would say things like “Kill me”, of course absolutely nothing harmful happened to me, your will is the most important part. It was very common for my intrusive thoughts to also call a spirit by name to me and tell it to harm me, of course nothing bad came from that either! So once again, your will is key here. And for the most part, you’ll be too focused during rituals to receive intrusive thoughts anyways, but if they come it does not matter.

If you have such an intrusive thought during a ritual, you can quickly think the opposite to counter the thought, such as “heal me”, or “protect me” etc. but over time as you realize your will is important and nothing happens, your intrusive thoughts will subside,

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So you’re saying number one on my coping list is correct? That nothing ever bad will happen no matter how horrible I feel?

If it’s not your will then yes. And if you don’t do… dodgy magick. But don’t worry about it.

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I will give you my opinion at this point in time, anyone who says they possess The Truth, avoid that person like the plague!

And I’m intentionally not reading other replies first, so if I disagree with someone, that’s not intentional and just the result of different, and equally real, life experiences etc.

1: I’m going to quote the estimable @AdamThoth, that:

Let’s boil this down, there are two ways to look at life and this will draw the lines so clearly it should be obvious to most. One side says life happens to me the other says I happen to life. When life happens to you you are almost guaranteed to be a victim of life and looking for anyone to blame besides yourself. When you happen to life you take accountability for your actions and don’t look to blame others you also take initiative for your life and actively conquer your obstacles to achieve success. When life happens to you you wait around for the world to change and give you what you feel like you are entitled to and when you don’t have it given to you OMG a victim again?!

Now, that thread had some controversial stuff which is no longer forum-legal so I can’t give the full link but it’s one of the most striking things I have ever read, and I kept it close to hand ever since.

So, it’s not about making some bland, nervous statement “life can’t hurt me - r-right, guys? GUYS?!” :eyes: - or anything so childishly passive (pardon my wording).

It’s about choosing to happen to life, in full force: to face any seeming obstacle and use it as a ladder to the next level. The choice of whether to put your big boy pants on and actually do that, is entirely yours to make.

2: see above.

3: highly unlikely to happen and just affirm to yourself that your soul and body remain united, do this no more than 3 times a day (to avoid obsessing) and you’re good to go. Wear or carry something made of iron (first choice), or steel (2nd choice).

I’m giving it to you straight because if I lie and you catch that out when someone says “oh yeah but that happened to someone I heard about” (and whether or not they’re telling the truth), you’ll feel even more doubt and fear. You can prevent this from happening very easily using those methods.

4: again unlikely, to the point of not being worth worrying about. I do wonder why you’re on a black magick forum though if this kind of thing worries you? Are you ready to step into power yet, and face these fears?

5: see my reply on your other topic about sayings.

6: first, “you always” is affirming something you don’t want, watch your language.

Second, affirm this from Robert Bruce, psychic self-defence expert:

“I am loved and I am worthy.
I am safe and I am free.
I am powerfully protected.
I am master of my body and ruler of my mind.”

Again, 3 times a day max is plenty for that. :+1:

7: I agree absolutely with that, but remember control is a choice, so be sure to make that choice actively and not passively.

Also, this: if you have major anxiety, I am not a therapist nor trained in psychology, so I may inadvertantly say something to you, meaning one thing, and your anxiety will seize upon that and change the meaning or make it seem like something terrible.

If anything I have said causes you anxiety, take that as an error in communication on my part and make the choice which causes you the least anxiety, and gives you the greatest sense of being able to overcome your problems, while feeling safe and protected.

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  1. makes sense, I don’t know how to take accountability and conquer number 1, I just accept the feeling and observe with no concern until it passes, surely there must be a better method
    I don’t have major anxiety , I do magick alone and don’t share it with my friends.
    I just want a swift resolution to number 1 and I’m settled
    Anyways you’re the best!!! I appreciate your response
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Yeah. @DarkestKnight gave you good advice there, I didn’t want to riff off other people’s replies in my own but that concept is solid. I used to overthink things, to a degree which affected my relationshiops and peace of mind, and managed to stop myself by observing it as a behaviour, a thing in itself, instead of mistaking that for “me,” or mistaking my thoughts under those circs for reality.

Of course it means I tend to be a bit unsubtle sometimes and ignore hints, but those aren’t necessarily bad things either. :wink:

In this case you “happen to” the anxiety, by observing it and making the choices, instead of letting IT happen to YOU.

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Yes it came from darkestknight , that’s how I came up with number 1. I thought no concern means nothing bad will ever happen regardless of how horrible I feel , I think of anxiety now as “it comes uninvited, being annoying, being useless and does nothing” while I’m in full control over myself

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So it’s proven time and time again that nothing bad happened ?

My mind thinks that acting out on my anxiety against my will that it’s the best way to become relieved, I know that much, but I still don’t know a way to cope… like find something else that relieves me?? Or what else??

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You could try this:

  1. feel the anxiety

  2. acknowledge that it’s JUST a feeeling, and that it’s not reality (etc)

  3. say “Hello old friend, thank you for coming to protect me, but I’m already safe and strong now”

It happens for a positive reason, it’s not an enemy, just calibrated to go off too soon, if you see what I mean?

My own overthinking is part of my phenomenal ability to focus on a thing and not let it go, keep coming at it from all new angles no matter what, and stay with it well beyond the point most people would feel discomfort or boredom. I value it as a tool when needed!

You could also try Afformations™ - affirming “Why am I less anxious, day by day?” or something similar. The full method explained here. :cherry_blossom:

If you like the way they work, you could replace 3. above with “Ah, now why is it safe for me to let this feeling go?” or something similar to that.

“Ask, and it shall be answered”! :smiley:

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Also, and I say this not to pick at you critically but because language tells us who we are: “to cope” implies these things are a burden, happening TO you (see my first reply, point 1) and that all you can do is try to live with them, like someone herded a rhinocerous into your bedroom and all you can do is try to live around it, putting up with the noise and the smell, and the danger it might get out of hand.

This is not correct: you can master your own reactions to things, it’s a learned skill. I would never just assert “We are all master of our minds” like it’s a simple thing, and everyone else is doing it as well, but - BUT - we CAN begin to make conscious choices around how we USE our minds.

Watch for passive language that implies something is happening to you, and that you’re helpless. You’re not. :+1:

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That’s amazing , I screenshot it and put it in my coping methods , might be one of the best advices given to me!!! I thought nobody would reply but better late than never , if you want I can update you with how I’m doing later in the day or week ,

Thank you for this, you’re awesome

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Sure, it would be great to update this thread as you find helpful things because remember, not everyone has the confidence or ability to even ask a question like this, because they have things going on which make it impossible for some reason, so what YOU write and experience will also help others, and maybe make them feel less alone when dealing with things like this! :+1:

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On my previous threads: “doing better but still having these thoughts” and “help with once a month anxiety” which advice do you mostly agree with? For example I agree with for example darkestknight because he is considered legit here on BALG , if you’ve read all his advice that was meant towards me for example , would you agree with all that he said??

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I understand why you’re asking, but I don’t feel comfortable “reviewing” other people’s responses, sorry, and part of moving into power is for YOU to choose what sits well with you at any point in time. :smiley:

If something helps you makes you feel like you’re moving in the direction you want, use it - no-one else’s opinion matters. :+1:

I only commented on his advice before because you mentioned it directly, and I shared Adam’s quote because it helped me a lot, and is one of the best things I’ve ever read on here in terms of pure sass and energy, but I’m not any kind of authority on stuff, to judge other people’s replies. :hamster:

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