I hate living

Has your life improved?

I hate and love living at the same time. Some days are better than others while other days just fucking suck. That’s life though, we must keep pushing forward even when we don’t want to. Suicide has came across my mind a lot aswell, but I always brush it off. You need to know that everyone has the power to change their life at any moment, both for the negative and positive. Taking responsibility for ones life is a must. There’s only so much magic, drugs, or anyone else can do for you. It’s all up to you. Everything begins and ends with your mind. Good luck. I hope you’re feeling better too


@Bowling270, i hope this attitude of your’s has changed somewhat but if not, please don’t be an ass to someone if you don’t know or care to understand the disease they have, thanks.

@Supernatual i do hope you’re doing better. Kendell says some very good things to think about.
Looking in that mirror and seeing the shadows is hard but an important step. Once you can do that you can learn how to absorb them (so to speak) I’ve found trying to banish the shadow or push it away only makes it that much stronger.
Here is a great youtube channel. I’ve found this lady to be very informative and helpful on the subject of Depression and how to face Shadows.

There are many here who know what you suffer so your definitely not alone. You always have a choice about your life and i don’t feel anyone has a right to take it away from you however suicide doesn’t help you in any kind of long run. You join whatever you call the energy of life and come back again. Some feel it inhibits your new life and some feel you come back because of it, but either way you are the controller that’s what you need to always remember.

You can do it, You can push this away. It’s a bitch, i know but you can do it and there are plenty here who honestly will try to help you succeed. You’re not alone.


Many beautiful and helpful advices here, let me give you my point of view. I’ve been there. I thought millions of times to end my life and I’ve tried twice. I’ve self-hurt myself hundreds of times. And there was no one who cared or helped. I found the strength to leave most of these behind me but, sometimes, a small part of it comes back and I know that no one will miss me deeply, their lives will be better without me around actually. But you know what? I won’t do anyone the favour to get rid of me, its my life and its already too short and I have things I want to do still. So they like it or not, I’m sticking around bitches…!


Let us grab you out of that!
None in our ranks is supposed to stay in such moods for self-destructive outcome.

Open yourself to actually start overcoming that past and re-claiming your Body!
I bet i woun’t be the only one, wanting to intervine into your favor!

Let’s see how far we can push you away from even remembering that bad past memories!




I am very young but still I tried to kill myself 20 times before realizing that is just dumb and weak…I feel trapped with my parents and my friends and I feel hopeless.A few months ago I just couldn’t help but cry like a baby…I begun contacting spirits but they told me that I could never become what I want to become if I don’t leave this…this prison where I am a slave…I cried for 20 minutes and I couldn’t do it anymore…I went into kitchen and made myself a sandwich and drank a bit of juice…I have hope though…You can’t change the past but you can help shape the future.Buy yourself something nice…Now would be a great time for a vacation…Find something in your life to keep you going and do something fun.Fun takes your mind away from any problems you have…Find some friends and a girlfriend or a boyfriend and forget the past.We were all weak in the past but now we know secrets for which some people would kill to learn.I know it is difficult to forget the past but we have to.I had to.My problems are mostly in present but I am also focused on the future.If you can summon spirits take a grimoire and find a spirit that can help you get something you need,like money or love and some spirits can help you emotionally.

Hurting yourself and suicide are for the weak.And you are not weak…You are a god in this world and you shape reality in any way you want…Remember that you are not weak and any problem can be solved.Happiness always banishes negativity…Good luck and Infernal Blessings

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@Yberion its great to see people open help here like that very cool

Welcome to the forum! Please take a moment and introduce yourself:


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I know that feel my friendo trust me I think about suicide every day…

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screw that ! move to Belgium— or the netherland, they have great medical assisted suicide, just drink alittle nambitol-- and drift into wherever sweet tasty and forever.

Best barefoot on earth or grass, adopt the body posture of the rune Elhaz – palms facing skywards and feet together. Call in mighty (healing/positive, etc.) energies from the multiverse. Hold Elhaz posture for as long as possible. When you feel the energy gathering around your solar plexus command that energy to flood your system. Then cross your arms across your body in the Sign of Osiris Risen, making sure that your palms touch in front of your shoulders.

The more often you practice, the quicker and more powerful the results. There’s lots of energies out there, so call these in.

Hope that helps.


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I think cyanide capsules should be given out instead of SSRIs sometimes because some ppl just want the never ending sleep instead of more meditation :pill:

True, thing is we’re good at killing others to make our own place of living worthwhile and enjoyable again, right?

Or something along that lines.

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I struggle to stay positive sometimes, but i find art and the process of creation helps.

Lucifer will not accept this, he is all about strength, will and fullfilment, not giving up and suicide. But he may help you to overcome this.


I am going to have a chat by PM with the member who posted they are feeling at the end of their tether.


I often think about endimg it when i grow tired and discouged i literaly lost everything i own twice in four years have been homeless have had everyone kick me in teeth literaly try to destroy me somewhere you just find streagth to keep going on secret is just to keep moveing forward might be at a snail pace pm if need someone talk to

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To all: if you’re having thoughts of hurting yourself, it is important that you discuss them with someone who is qualified to help, such as a crisis helpline in your country. Please visit this link to find the appropriate number:


If you feel that you may be an immediate danger to yourself, please call your local emergency number or go to your local hospital emergency room right away. If you are unsure of the right number to call, please visit this link and call the number next to the country where you are located:

This forum cannot assist you if you feel this way, someone may say the wrong thing with good intentions and make things worse,so please seek help from a medical professional or someone you trust in your offline life. if that’s where you’re at right now.

International: Befrienders Worldwide http://www.befrienders.org/

If that seems too much to handle, consider joining this group that offers non-judgmental peer-support if you think it will be supportive:


This is also very thought-provoking, especially for anyone dealing with shame over feeling, or having felt, that their life had become unliveable: http://www.metanoia.org/suicide/

Please seek appropriate support and help, including by contacting people in your offline life, as this forum is not designed to offer support for people in crisis.