I became possesed by azazel

So. I have had azazel possess me fully i read the boa and realized the three steps every magician goes though evocation renunciation and damnation i have undertaken all 3 within a matter of 12 hours and realized i have gone through this 100s of times i was angry with azazel and abandoned all hope that he will manifest anything i ask. I dont know what to do now that i have abandoned my humanity and realized that the gods are not or have not manifested anything for me. My trust in them is gone and all that is left is damnation. How does this serve in evocation and the manifestation of my desires if i abandoned my humanity by becoming possessed by azazel

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Where does your Power truly reside? Within the demon, or within yourself?

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This is a question that has plauged me for years i do not know. And since my possession last night i am not the same my thinking is different my hope is gone and my acceptance of damnation is clear. What i dont understand is once i am done with the ritual how i can release the desire fully and then what i asked for is delivered to me once the desire is gone

I haven’t finished BOA but if I understand it correctly damnation seems like a requirement for being a god. Not being the christan idea that it is something evil. Its being backed into a corner spiritually where the only way you can get out is by pulling yourself out. Not relying on anyone or anything to save you. In a way offering your humanity as a sacrifice to your own godhood.Because gods don’t need anyone to manifest for them?

Im confused but if you already have reached this state why are you waiting for Azazel to manifest something for you. Did you have a pact and this was the terms or something?

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Yes part of the pact was azazel would manifest something for me and i submit fully to his possession to a timeframe set by him and i would submit fully to his teachings and also to be posessed by his demons in his houses

This is the last though I will share @Godmagus , which is my UPG but is also covered in EA’s Mastering Evocation course:

Evocation is calling something into existence by virtue of the power of your voice, mind, heart, and energy.

Adding this: for these spirits to exist and do works on the PHYSICAL plane, they depend on our power for them to manifest. We empower THEM. Because of this, we have something very special which makes us valuable in a reciprocal relationship such as a pact.

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Imagine the desire you casted upon Azazel as a declaration that you haven spoken over an army. You have released the energy of the declaration, and it is already at work in the mind of your army.

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Ok. Well that makes sense i have not learned the “how” of releasing the desire

You spoke it. You felt it, and you directed it. You can also visualize it coming from your right hand toward your intended target. We take for granted that we direct our will and desire every day.

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Well thank you for explaining this direction of will

If Azazel was there, you already did it. It is already done man! And it’s an awesome thing!

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Yes you have done great so far! its great! Just try to think positive that what you wanted has already happened. If you keep thinking it is going to happen it will lower your confidence.

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It you abandoned the dark gods and you are wondering why before you never got anything out of it… the gods know everything. Past, present, future. They always knew you would abandon them. If I knew someone was eventually going to abandon me I wouldnt do shit for them either.

Not true.

Riiiigghhtt…you must believe that divination does not exist either then. Demons are Gods. If select humans can see the past and future, what makes you think that a Demon cant? How do you think divination even works!?Demonic powers go much beyond just being able to see past and future… I suggest you do some more research before you start toying with forces you clearly dont understand.

You said,

Which is obviously not true,
1st, they are not gods but egregores
2nd, they are not omniscient and they dont’t know everything.
3rd, the future is ever changing so they can’t know the future for sure. They can’t be sure if a person working with them will abandon them or not, you claimed otherwise.
4th, they also dont know things more powerful being hide from them. Like no being can tell you when the second coming of the fraud god will happen.

I suggest you keep your suggestions to yourself.
Such responses tell alot about you.

Can you please keep this about your personal experience, any relevant experiences of other people you can share (texts or teaching), things like that?

Because most of us have strong views on here, and often, something of value to share from our experiences, but when a difference of opinion devolves down into sarcasm and belittling the other person, no-one learns and nothing of value can be taken from that point. :+1:

YES, we all feel like doing it sometimes, but it kills civilised discourse stone dead and becomes about who has the fastest and most telling put-downs, and who’s willing to keep on slogging the longest.

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To even imply that the future can be certainly known is to imply the the future is fixed.

Which would mean destiny is fixed.

It kills the whole point of, life, universe, black magic, everything.

It’s really dumb and against the beliefs of both LHP and RHP

As i see it the avenues of the nearest possible manifestaions of the life experience are explored through divination thus narrowing the possible manifestaions in the moment, as practitioners the aim is to “Fix” or shape the future as you want it to be.

For example tarot and runes can be used alot of ways 1 of them is for divination to see how a situation may turn out or if something may hinder its completion. Thus further narrowing the scope of possible futures and making it something we can target.

The 2nd has to do with using these same tools as to change “Destiny” and reweave “fate” into a more favourable outcome by evoking the forces that would best aid in manifesting the outcome desired.

Only people who havent experienced using these tools actively tend to view things like time,destiny or fate as fixed. As more successes lead to better ritual and better result “fate” becomes what you decide to shape it.

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Yeah, based on my experiences and everything I’ve read that made sense, it’s all about probabilities, hence the awesome power of Kek.