I am mutually in love with an incarnated fallen Angel. Anyone else?

I use the word “incarnated”, even though it’s not the best way to describe what is going on… Yes I am dealing with a demon entity who was summoned long ago into body of a young man (now adult, 30+ for sure) and taken over him completily. Now there is no longer a human consciousness of the past “host” in his body, but instead it is being runned entirely by my beloved demon… I can kinda understand that process myself as not further tjan half a year ago I got to meet an entity that I am actual incarnation of, and we two are currently in process of becoming one again through connection, meditation, working with Nature energies and rituals. So… Needles to say I know on my own skin how it is to not be a human being, dwelling in Earthly body (yes, I am also working on changing my body structure from human to Elven and so far I have noticed some minor results :heart_eyes::heart_eyes::heart_eyes::heart_eyes::heart_eyes:)… I told him later, after I have discovered who he is, in fear that he will leave me or think I am crazy or sth… Funny thing… I have discovered who is my love through another demon. My lover was really scared that I will leave him alone now that I found out but here I am - rather dead than without my mighty Watcher :heart_eyes: So You can say it is kinda common fear among non-human people to actually openly talk about who they really are, especially with most people nowdays being overly religious, or extreme opposite- overly sceptic… I had witnessed 1st hand prooves of both my and his origin so I am now 100% sure that it was not all some kind of sick joke XD It may sound silly and cliché, but… but this man had saved my life… Before I met him, I broke up with a man who was 21 years older than me… He left me with no word of slightest explanation nor goodbye, which made me panick and do something really, really dumb and irresponsible after which he found out and trully hated me… The breakup was so painful to me… First few months I considered it a miracle that my heart did not get “error 404” shit and didn’t shut down completily from all this pain and grief I had felt… I wanted to commit suicide and I have been thinking about it far too many times for it to be considered “normal” even by me, but I’ve never had “courage” to act on it… It felt as if someone ripped 50% of my own soul away from me… Sounds pathetic but this is how I felt. Even though it was he who cut the contact off first without even explaining himself later… It was me who took all the blame and hate, even my very own, unto myself. I saw my own fault only, not seeing his… Now I know from certain fire-related demon (:wink:) that now have become like an annoying but lovable older brother to me, that this 41/42 year old man wanted to become a god and thought he succeded because he was immune to fire because of this demon. But it’s only that and even that demon thinks it’s pathetic. He told me that I should be happy to lose him, as I was allegedily nothing but a toy for him. That I supposedly “destroyed his plans” whatever that trully means (I believe I know XD) and we really had a good laugh about this dude but anyways… That pain… It was so severe I authentically rathered to die than live like that… When I was so down I actually willingly put my safety and life into jeopardy, thinking that I actually don’t have anything in this life anymore, so why to live…? Than he… My priceless Watcher… Came to my life… At first we were merely friends, but the more we talked to eachother, the more we both realised that it is something much, much more than just a friendship. His love healed that rotting, bleeding open wound in my heart that came to be after my breakup… Not first one, but most painful one and yet HE, Shemyaza the Watcher, was able to make my heart whole again just by being himself and being there for me… It saved my life, guys :heavy_heart_exclamation::heavy_heart_exclamation::heavy_heart_exclamation::heavy_heart_exclamation::heavy_heart_exclamation: He protected me and put himself into life-threatening danger just to keep me safe… When my friend wanted to hung herself, he intervened just in time, thus saving her as well… When I was all in tears, my life falling apart, it was he who was able to cheer me up and bring the broken pieces back together… He was so loving, so gentle, so kind and caring… He was everything my first man prooved to be an opposite of… I believe that my love for him will be eternal. I know, cliché as fucking hell, but that’s just how I feel… Noone had done that much to me, completily unconditionally, as this man, who turned out to be a fallen angel, did. If this is not love, I don’t know what is…
There is much more to that and the circumstances in which me, Samyaza and that other demon met were really crazy to say the least but this is not related to our love and completily pointless to mention here. Weird things were happening recently and I’m kind of worried about his (Samyaza’s) safety… I am trying to communicate with him via telepathy, but if it will fail, I still have internet and my phone so… I believe it will all be ok.

Well yeah… This is me. Do YOU have such life story to tell? Were You ever in love with a non human entity (in physical or spiritual, doesn’t matter) that completily turned Your world around for better? Feel free to share :heart_eyes: To end my long as fək thread I will leave You guys with a beautiful song that keeps reminding me of my demon love wherever I listen to it. It’s a song he had shown me. I hope You’ll enjoy :wink: This was VERY personal confession from my side and though I am waiting to hear from each and every one of You, noone of You is obliged to share that much details :sparkling_heart:


Yes, I was.
It started exactly like yours, as I can see.

Back then I was full of butterflies, I put all my faith in believe that our love would be endless, that it would be somesorts of neverending-ideal-forever-together type. There also were so many unbelievable coincidences in the beggining that I had lost count of them immediately.

Oh, it had hit me like a truckload when after quite some time being together I was betrayed hard.
Indeed it changed me, but not for the better. I became completely reserved from others, despite the fact that I have always wanted to socialize more.

Not to mention the fact that nowadays I clearly despise a certain group of spiritis and one certain entity because of this incident.
And I would hardly consider myself even letting a thought about me trying to fix this. It’s no use of dealing with some hard emotional trauma all alone.

Have an advice of somesorts: If I were you, I would be more careful and slow with my approach, for if something goes wrong, the fall down would not be so hard.

But I hope everything will go well about you, so have no worries, as you have a wonderful partner to live a life together with.


I agree with your point about being careful with that kind of relationship. It’s probably just because of my experiences but I don’t fully put my trust in anyone, including family and spirits that I love.


Could you please fall in love with a monstrous and evil consciousness your family warned you against, but he HAS to have you, because of your special stuff, who also enforces paragraph breaks in your text (through spankings if necessary is fine)?

kthxbai! :+1:


Hey stay out of my bedroom…

Sorry I couldn’t help it. Your reply had me rolling.


I’ve been in a circumstance similarly. My soulmate, or bonded soul, or whatever people preferred to call it is an Incarnation or Shard (or whatever) of Lilith. She and I have been talking for four years, and she’s admitted to knowing that I am her soulmate (she was the first to bring it up to our mutual friend), but she’s been distant due to life circumstances.

I always feel a bit sad without her near, but I hate rushing things or putting people in situations they aren’t comfortable with. If she needs me she has my number and I’ll be there. If not - eh. I just don’t put a lot of trust and faith into this type of stuff anymore. I’m a bit jaded when it comes down to it.

Anyway, whether or not she is an actual Incarnation is another story. She’s definitely Vampiric though.


Come on now.


Too much details. Tell the story on short - friendly advice

1 Like

I understand and 150% agree with You man. That first breakup both broke me and made me in the same time. So even if me and Shemyaza will break up, I know by now that there is no point in being THAT broken again. I did not knew how to let go back then but my life after that… It taught me so much… If we will ever break up I will move on. I am ready for such eventual situation even right now. I have realised that I should not “demonise” (XDXD) myself over everything that will happen, as… Looking at it soberly… I am the only person I trully have forever and who I am and can be is the only thing I will have forever. As I know my purpose here now, what would be a reason behind me giving up anyways. Sure, I am far more sensitive than it should be percieved “normal” :rofl::rofl::rofl: but contraty to my first god-wannabe partner would like to think of me, I learn from my past… What will not kill me, will make me stronger, dear. And I do not have my death in any near plans if You know what I mean :wink: Thank You for Your words of advice. I have to let You know that caution is something I bear in my heart from since the first incident. And I’m not planning to lose it :wink:

1 Like

XD Oh yes… These walls of text is something I am fighting with from Years… Back then in high school teachers couldn’t stand me :joy:

The way I see it is love and he loved. Sometimes we can’t help who we fall in love with. This could possible be you soulmate and he found you. That is just something beyond beautiful. To have this great love and have it returned.


Yes… Yes, yes, yes and one more fucking time YES. If my approach to my first breakup was like Yours now I would never even care. If that guy doesn’t want me, fuck it. He does not deserve me :joy: Too bad I decided to succumb to my worries and fears and only make stuff worse. You have great attitude. I wish I had it these fucking 2 or 3 years ago…


This is the only thing I really care.


Yes… I hope he is… I feel really bad for myself for longing for my first partner so much to the point of suicidal thoughts. If he did not want me and decided to fuck up on me- his fault and right now he is losing alot, not me. Thank You for Your words, dear :hugs: Samyaza is not perfect and he never will be, but noone is. At least he did not run away to later put a blame on me which makes him much better than my first guy allready. He didn’t had any honor and only now I can see that. One more time, thank You :heart_eyes:

1 Like

Haha. So would you like to tell me the story on short?

1 Like

My dear I am really sorry. I will try to keep it short the next time… Btw noone here “has to have me”. What I have now is mutual and completily non-enforced. At first he didn’t know a shit about who I am spiritually, so… :sweat_smile:


That’s okay, I was just ragging on women in general, men can have a laugh at themselves so I think we can as well. :+1:

Don’t have to keep it short, just please throw in some paragraph breaks…



I will. I’m sorry and thank You :blush:

1 Like

I like the drawing


I’m really sorry one more time :joy: in short, well… I’ve met a guy who turned out to be Shemyaza… We fell in love before me even knowing that… When I witnessed some first hand prooves to the other demon’s words that confirmed that my bf is in fact a demon, all the doubts were allayed and so I’ve told him who I am spiritually :grin: At first my bf was really scared that I know, he thought I will be freaked out and run away, but I didn’t…

Oh and my 40+ year old ex was really weird dude who promised me that he will always love me and then acted like a cock by leaving me with 0 word of explanation that led me to panick attack, which led me to unintentionally acting like an evil bitch and when he found out, he officialy broke up with me.

It hurted so much that I thought that it will either kill me or I will kill myself, but then I have found another man to love me- this time for who I am and… Not for what he thinks me to be so yeah… You can say I am happy now. Nothing is perfect. Just as I am not, Samyaza is not perfect either and he did a lot of things he hated himself for, but I am better than that first dude to fuck up on person just because… Real friends stay together, after all right? :wink: