The first step is figuring out what my desire is. The more vivid the description the greater chance of success. Say exactly what you want, because while they do often see what is best for you, to feel satisfied you must make clear what you desire.
You must be ready to be declined. Sometimes I feel like they will never agree to my terms because they may see the tribute as not enough; or they may disagree with me.
and please… DON’T try to order them around. I find traditional Goetic evocation to be too much Judeo-Christian wailing and self righteousness to ever build sustainable reasonably amicable relationships. Show respect.