This is a really stupid and probably quite obnoxious question, but it eats away at me. To those who follow more of the LHP, how do you let yourself manipulate another’s will?
I am very weakminded, but I am also very thirsty for results. I am well aware this isn’t a good combination, and I’m trying to change it. But how did you release your sense of “right” in order to begin being more forward in your desires?
I have been essentially pussyfooting around what I want in my romantic life (hence why I’m in this tag rather than just general evoking) because I am afraid of getting what I want and feeling guilt. I’m not at all trying to moralize on anyone else-- if magic has gotten what you want, that’s fucking amazing and I’m genuinely so happy for you. It’s just me, and my hang up.
I’ve seen some people say that entities can’t “create” a feeling, just enhance it. This is somewhat comforting. But I guess I’m always just thinking like… “How do I explain this to my person if I ever get them into my life how I’d like them to be? Would they be angry? Would I be able to live with myself?” I’ve had this experience before, but then my influence was very mild-- asking to get closure and nothing else. Now I want to ask about removing boundaries, about unleashing feelings, etc. But I’m afraid of one day being overwhelmed with guilt and ruining everything because I break down and admit what I’ve done. The thing is though, they didn’t even care before. So is it literally just me?
Did you ever have any troubles with this sense of self righteousness? How did you move past it? Or was it just never an issue for you?
You have to decide whether the guilt you feel is self imposed or imposed by a society that tells you how you should feel about manipulating others.
The thing with the LHP is, you get to set the boundaries of your own moral code. Contrary to the edge lords and psychopaths among us, being a black magician has nothing to do with being violent or psychotic, and everything to do with steering your own life. Personal responsibility is paramount, so you can still be what society calls a “good” person, caring about other people, and be a black magician, if you so choose to be. They are not mutually exclusive.
It is completely up to you to define what kind of person you want to be.
I suggest some period of introspection on your own morality, and the lines you choose not to cross. Get a picture of where you stand, and whether what you think is “right” is your choice for yourself, or society’s choice for you.
Once you have understood what is choice, and what is not, you can then decide to act in accordance with what is your choice of values. We only feel guilt when we act outside of the internal values we hold.
It might help to realise that everything we do when in the company of other people is a form of manipulation. Whether we dress to impress, or walk around with our head down and shoulders slumped, we are giving off subtle signals in order to manipulate the emotions and behaviour of others.
That last bit is very, very true. I appreciate this a lot, thank you so much.
I know everything is constantly a game of mental and emotional manipulation whether we realize it or not, I guess I’m just afraid of people looking at me differently for the things I do. But I mean, if they do, then I have no need having them in my life. I’m already really quite manipulative due to being emotionally in touch, I just consistently have a hard time cracking the eggs to get to the juicy reward within.
People pray absently to the Christian god for all sorts of things and no one ever judges them for that. It’s not really much different from me asking Dantalion to reveal the truth in someone’s mind so I know what the right decision is for me.
I don’t know why I continue to hold myself back beyond just being afraid of succeeding. Better to love and lose then to not love at all. Sorry for blogging lmfao, but I appreciate it.
About love and, for example, me even lusting after engaged females, my idea was/is that it’s all part of me rising to success (should I meet a single woman, all the better). Provided that such a situation will be stable (naturally by also doing my part about that) I wouldn’t “transgress” anymore.
I think I understand. So essentially your logic is that if it’s “meant to be”, it’ll happen with little resistence, and if it’s not, it won’t? Please do correct me if I’m wrong.
I am indeed a believer that not all things can be accomplished through magic, and that it mostly serves as… a catalyst, of sorts. Doesn’t make anything and everything. Just expedites some processes. So this logic would make sense to me! But many disagree, and those alternate perspectives are equally important and valued.
For me, it’s Chan/Zen Buddhism. Everything is illusory and arbitrary, right and wrong just fleeting points of reference. That which is like me and serves my ends is good, that which is not, is bad. We are always good in our perspective, only in the eyes of other people can we be bad. However, because they are not like us and serve not our ends, they are bad, and, thus, are irrelevant.
Another teaching of the Buddha: All dharma is empty, even the dharma of empty dharma (readas: Believe what suits you best, everything is objectively moot, so even when you are wrong you are right).
So to answer you, and hopefully help with your struggles on this path, the idea isn’t to stop being self-righteous, the idea is to understand when to be. You have to work subjectively and objectively equally. Finding the perfect balance is near impossible. Meditation, constantly questioning what you could do differently to improve your life or your self is the key.
However, I won’t try to tell you how to live your life or practice your rituals, we all perceive reality differently and to you an entity may be a beautiful creature of light and to someone else they may be the literal embodiment of the devil.
Simple repeat until it is a fact! “I am not a doormat, I am not a doormat, I am not a doormat” once you tell yourself that you can also tell your self to fuckoff and stop being a everyone’s free lunch. Would you feel guilty taking some air to breath in a room full of people? Why would you over analyze every possible emotion outcome of every action you want to take with a person to obtain what you desire? I know why I used to, my mother informed me at a very early age that I am the reason her life is so fucked up she never really choose to even pretend to love me. She hated boys and being the oldest I would she the way that see would spoil my sisters and cover them in love as she look through me like I was but a ghost. So I got in to the habit of not wanting to spread the pain so I would over think all the possible emotional results of my actions, yup my dick didn’t get out of my pants much. Then I released that know one really fucking cares how nice I am to them, because why would they I was nothing but a piss weak doormat scared of being walked so over compensated by over inflating other value. Now I just have to try and find a way to want to live with love in my life, as I was taught to live without it, it was a girl thing and I was a boy big boys don’t need love that is why they are strong. Sad but true just remember “I am not a doormat” and things start to get easier, well they did for me.