Hi , I am Faith Ng, I am a Chinese born and raised at Asia-Malaysia - Kuala Lumpur. I am 39 years old now, but my outlook always make people though I am 27-29, because I am just 157cm, 43kg, very tiny and little for many people (look young), and I admit I am still not very mature in many things too that make people not easy think I am age more than 30 ==.
My first language is Chinese Cantonese & Chinese Mandarin, I speak Malay and others Chinese dialects language too, my English is poor and I still learn to read and understand English sentences, I can write English because when I study in school English is one of subjects but I often have grammar errors or mistakes on using some word, my English exam results is bad too while I am student, in reality, due on my living environment, is rarely need to speak English, so I can’t speak English in proper way and while I listen people speaking English is a bit harder to get what they talk instantly, but I will keep learn. I watch YouTube video must with subtitles on…
I come here because the video I watched in YouTube, I am new and I still try to understand and learn about left hand path, black magic, demon, ancient god…etc. I grow up at christian family, I experience a lot problem and down at my real life, although I always keeps on go church everyday Sunday with my family, I can’t be happy and I found my pray always get ignored, out of sudden at 3-4 month ago, I started thinking about is god real? I don’t know why, I keep think Lucifer is god and not satan/ghost, and he is love and he is the one can help me on my problem, I stop go church, fight with family a lot after stop all activities in church and I start search and finding everything related with Lucifer online, I started get many info, but mostly in English, I still not know and understand lot of things, I want to know more and understand more, but I don’t know how to started…what to do… I even spent money to buy a Lucifer pact at one US website, I thought the pact can get Lucifer solves my big problem in reality life, I don’t know is it correct or wrong, but then I didn’t get what I needed, my problem not solve and I lose the things I cherish and value yesterday, I am so heartbroken but I won’t blame, I will take it as my communication in English have problems…I can’t tell out what I need in full in English.
I use my limit understand on English to try set up a very simple and not complete tools temporary altar for Lucifer that can hide inside a box from the article or video on YouTube that teach for it in English and try to use the way I understand to offering Lucifer in secret in my room everyday started End on January, with rose, blood, but I don’t know what I do is correct or wrong, I just wanted to pray and tell him all my problem, my sadness, my issues…but it’s feel like nothing, I believe he can hear me, but I can’t feel him. Is very frustrating because I not sure what I do is it correct and is it Lucifer there, but I know is worst if I give up. So I keep searching about how to contact with Lucifer.
I saw many video said that meditation is a good way to feel and communicate with him, I think I facing big issues on this, because i tried nearly 2 month time to learn meditation, but I keep failed, I can’t concentrate every time I closed my eyes, maybe is because I am sad, I can’t feel safety while I closed my eyes, I don’t know the correct way to do this, so I still keep search and try to know more about this, but is interesting that every-time I search about contact Lucifer, I will saw a lot video come from this website, I still can’t get the correct video on my problem and questions, but I already watched some of videos that related with Lucifer…although I can’t really understand all the video I watched because is in English, but I guess is Lucifer want me watch them all.
Hope my word not make me rude, because English is still my big problem on language.
Hi all, nice to meet you all.