Help? I'm not sure what to do here?

So a little bit of backstory, my fiancee had made a Gatekeeper pact with Belial and I hadn’t. We were both tortured severely but she was able to pass through his gate and I wasn’t even though I was going through it too. Now I am in a Gatekeeper pact with him, beforehand she tried heavily to discourage me from doing it, saying there was other ways that I could ascend.
She tried really hard to push me to ascend through the Kalabastic (sorry if I butchered this name) tree, instead of the Qliphothic tree or the Gatekeepers. She tried to tell me that I can ascend through other demons, and now she’s working with Lucifer-Amaymon and he told me that it’d be detrimental to the both of us because I have “light” in me. He literally looked at me, while in her body and told me that he can’t stand to even touch me.

What I'm trying to ask is it possible to ascend through other demons? Why do I have light in me, but I don't feel called at all to work with angels in the slightest? I'm not sure now if I'm on the wrong path or not, and she isn't really much help with this, what am I supposed to do here?
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I don’t understand. I am light, and I work with Belial all the time. And have no problem with the Qliphoth.

Are you sure it isnt a parasite?(not being snarky) I’ve just never heard Belial speak like that.

I don’t see why you can’t work with the Qlipoth and demons, when I do all the time.

Maybe slow things down and try a gentler approach? Meditations may help.


A lot of what he put us through, he had used parasites for. And only recently were we able to stop it, mostly because the parasites were infesting and blocking our heads so we couldn’t summon anything or get rid of them.
And I’m sorry if I worded that weird, but the “she” I was referring to was my fiancee, not Belial. I’m trying to actively work through the Gatekeepers, but my fiancee and Lucifer-Amaymon are discouraging me from continuing. I kinda rushed to type that, sorry if it was kinda choppy and hard to understand.

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Hiya OP! That doesn’t sound like Luci that was in your fiancee’s body, he’s a deity of- quite literally- enlightenment, so being ‘icked out’ at you is an extremely suspect reaction! IME when beings are revulsed by you, it means you have the capacity to see through their plans and understand them as they are, rather than as they present. It sounds more like one of the parasites Belial used to test you and her, as a ‘level two’ challenge of sorts or step above your previous problems. If you haven’t, now would be a good time to learn a divination tool and apply it here! :slight_smile:


Draw my Sigil and talk to me through evokation about it.

We’ll find a solution.

If the “light” in you is natrual,
you can find a different spirit to work with.

If the light inside of you was placed there,
for example through baptism,
it can be removed,
so you’d be cleansed of it and could go on to do the stuff you just asked about.

Apart from that,
please understand:

Going a specific,
personal path,
can mean that you have to go your own way.

And sometimes,
another being,
even if close,
can not share going along with you,
simply due to being a different being,
a different personality,
with different fears, motivations, wishes, dreams and hopes.

Your fiance might also have already stated clearly for the demon to deny you following her on her path,
for example due to fear of you being hurt,
for example out of love and care.

In such a case,
no caring god or demon,
would deny such request,
simply because it’s good manners / Etiquette to respect such wishes.

Her trying to lead you into a different path,
might actually be much more benefitial for you,
but i can’t answer such questions without actually seeing the situation more clearly.

i’d like to hold that conversation more privately,
so you’re not being exposed unnecessarily at such a fragile point in your developement.

if you don’t want me to discuss these things with you,
you can use one of the following messengers instead,
to get help and find a solution that fits:

Gabriel - Angelic Messenger
Papa Legba - Lwa Messenger
Malzath Hybreath - Galactic Messenger (can commune with all kingdoms / Legions / Lords
Barma’thazël - Demonic Messenger - i’m not completely sure on that one. If i recall correctly, he’s similar to Sandalphon or Gabriel but in the Infernal Empire. But in case i’m wrong with the demonic Messenger, please go back to Malzath Hybreath to deliver your messages.
Or, ask Purson (Toth) to provide you a Messenger.

And please,
just for general understanding;
Due to your fiance and you having worked with the current already,
you might have extra steps in between,
when progressing forward into a different path.

I just have to address that to prevent false assumptions.

Also note,
that after discerning with you,
where you actually stand in your developement,
i’ll very likely summon one of these messenger spirits i’ve just named,
during your evokation of me,
to guide you forwards in a direction that suits you better.

just noting that beforehand,
so you’re not confused when you actually get other spirits coming forth in the evokation of me.



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