Hi, I am an aspiring magician who knows next to nothing about it. The only magick I have practiced is some sigils, concentration in buer’s sigil and I did some rituals from a gallery of magick book. Nothing worked.
I became interested in magick because I have a sensation that it can be used to make life easier.
At this moment I need more than anything magick that can improve my self-esteem, self-worth and remove shame. I am working through this with metta meditation (has somewhat worked).
My other goals are: making money, I want to develop a skill to assist me in making money so I could work part time; becoming an arhat; discover all these things that I am not aware of (such as the astral realm, the higher self, gods, etc) and learn magick to make myself better at things like programming.
I come from an atheist background, up until not so long ago I didn’t believe in anything and now I don’t know what to believe. What I want to say about this is that I haven’t chosen a side, i.e: I am not a satanist or whatever other “society” there may be.
There is the issue that I can’t do rituals, I don’t have the privacy to do them at this moment (and I think this will remain like this for years). What other ways are there to ask an entity for help? Would focusing in their sigil with intent be of use? For example: focus in Haagenti sigil with the intent “please help me with my emotional problems”.
I also like magick that is “mental”, I tried a PK game (https://psychicscience.org/pk2a) where you have to create an image in the computer using your brain (and will?) and I like it, that is how I want to do magick.
Is it possible to create something as I do with PK? For example: focus on getting a free chocolate the same way I focus on creating the image, I know it won’t appear there in front of me, just like the image does, but maybe doing it will “get things moving” and then I will get my chocolate a few days after.
I think that is all, I hope I didn’t bore you 
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Any advice on what to do?
