Head get fucked up, solution?

If I’m loosing my mind, that I’m good at nothing in magick because of this so i can not help myself, that I have confiance in nobody and that the medecin that I have seen give me no news with my blood test and a mental and psychilogical test that they was supposed to call me for scheduling a date, what should I fucking do ??? I’m losing my mind and I don’t know what to do more, I can not wait eternally with this state of mind…

And please don’t try to fuck me up more, an animals in fear is way more dangerous, but just please just don’t do that. I don’t deserve this shit

This may be a sign to take a break from magick for a bit. Ground yourself until you’ve regained your senses.

1 Like

I have not done magick since 4 months since it have happen ._.

Stop researching and focus on meditation. You probably have a lot of unanswered questions and information you havent taken thr time to work through.

This happens to me, i take a month to ground myseld and work through my questioms and confusion. Its important to not research during this time, adding more information just adds to the build up.

You have to take time to integrate what you learn. Humans resist change strongly. What youre feeling is likely similar to cognitive dissonance.

This is just from my,experience.

If you cant cope go into a fuck it mode. Just keep saying “i am immortal, whats the worst that could happen, whatever happens, happens”

4 Likes

Okay do you need a break from this forum, I can pause your account, no questions asked and no demerit or anything?

People can post stuff in reply, but it may not be helpful.

Let me know, you may need to just walk away for a bit. :+1:

2 Likes

I will try harder meditation, it sure it could help… But I don’t know what question to ask myself or how to find answers. It will probably just come with time I think…
The worst that can happen that I always think when my state is too hard to support some days is that I will lost my mind, forget who I am, where I am and etc… It scare me. I want to live. I wasnt thinking that some years ago, but losing myself has always been a big fear for me… I dont want to become vegetable ^^"

No it is okay, when I need a break I just dont come… It just that I’m scared sometime of what people could do just for their pleasure or idk

It is helpful to talk, I can not fall asleep right now ^^" it help to free my mind

1 Like

So this happened when i first moved out for example. When your brain undergoes a lot of change, it kicks in the fight or flight. Because youre not on autopilot anymore, your brain is paying attention to the details again and settling in to the change.

Our belief system is drastically different than society’s so just researching this stuff is gonna throw you in head spins if you dont take time to ground.

This why many of us do it in a very organized fashion. Pick a demon and objective>focus solely on this demon or angel> learn everything you can about them and what they have to teach>integrate and put this new knowledge/connection to work> then take a grounding break with no evocation. Then pick a new one and do it again.

Keeps my head screwed on. People would fall into madness from the necronomicon not because the gods were evil but because people would evoke many at the same time. Its like having 2 routers right next to eachother, interferce between entities can cause a lot of cognitive “noise” so to speak.

2 Likes

Does it can put my head in fog like ? It’s like I’m “out of my body” everyday. I’m here but not here. Everything feel distant. Object, people, feeling,me. I compare it to the feeling when I was smoking cannabis (I had to stop to see if it was the problem, but I still feel out of my body) It’s really the same feeling, but without the fun part, and everyday without pause. Even my dreams feel weird. it’s like having a veil in front of me in some way… Everything feel less too, it’s hard to feel sad or happy and when I am angry or I cry it’s because I understand nothing arround me and what is happening to me. It could be a mental problem, a physical problem, magick, I don’t know… I have not really done evocation. A little with Duke Sallos, and King/Queen Beleth, but not much. And during one of the day I could not support my state of mind and was crying, I break the glass bottle I have keep the petition I have done with Duke Sallos on the floor with rage, after crying in top of it saying “if it cause what is happening please stop, I dont want anything anymore”, thinking it could have caused what happen…

I really don’t know why I am in this state seens so long…

1 Like