Hey All!
Just wanted to share a few thoughts with you all. As a kid the very first and hope fully not last time I have ever seen an apparition knowingly, I fell unto this path in one way or another. Studied everything from the multitude of religions and practices. Trained hard in my youth physically and spiritually. The single instance changed my life though negative(I was scared senseless at the time).
Regardless, my goal was to rip the veil down and induce another point of development of history where magick and technology benefiting human development. My question is to you all: how do we do this as magicians? That goal led me to the Yesodic realm and those that have read my prior posts to Lilith (sorry after this many times I feel like a promoter throwing a plug in lol). Through this work the and my studies subtle manipulations of emotions aside with psychological knowledge are apparent.
The results have both ended in great successes and detriment equally distributed in my 20’s. Manipulating my reality is sporadic at times ( falling into the right opportunity at the right time for a specific reason to help me grow as a person or get what I want)and continuous when needed( in the negative worst case scenario varies from inducing injuries to others, to blackouts where prior to the last drink I tell myself to get myself home leaving from areas where I never ended up robbed or hurt know that the altered state of consciousness I was in, my subcon will get me home safe and sound. I’m in the tristate area and in those days preferably avoidable parts of Brooklyn).
None of these things mean much in the scope of my goals. Today I can say my development have benefited all aspects of myself but no closer to my goal. Am I that egotistical to think that wanting technology and magick to be synonymous with humanity taking their next step in development? In my lifetime I would love to see it(not that old, but look at where we at as a species 
) Just a ramble/rant . Thanks for the read.
Best
Keez