So after my wreck a few months ago, some of my memory was lost or suppressed and forgotten about, not to mention my senses arent as good. Which is actually probably whats best for me, starting over. I’ve become a complete fool. Disrespecting Demons, Kings, and basically every entity ive ever been in contact with, being way to cocky, over confident and greedy towards them (Before the wreck and after it too). I’d just like to apologize to them all and make amends. Although I am grateful for them being patient with me, you see, I didnt have the best up bringing, and dont know much about respect, and I can be really bipolar/emotionally unstable, double minded, and selfdestructive at times, and fuck things up, but nothing bad has happened to me other than the wreck. I actually feel like a fool for writing this whole thing but I need to get my mind clear and sorta vent I guess, theres not many friends, actually probably none that I can actually talk to about this, 2 of my friends claim to be into the occult, my best friend for sure is full of bs for the most part, and the other friend im not too sure if hes being serious or faking to be cool (Where I started on the occult, is from him, alot of my knowledge is from him). I guess I’ll just be honest. I’m a greedy, arrogant, lustful, childish, cocky, lazy, and over confident fool. I tend to put myself above those whom I wish to become friends with, the demons I have around me and watching over me, I should be more respectful and grateful towards them, hell they’ve saved me from certain death at least four times I know of. And I shouldn’t cut demons off and be absolutely rude to them. I’ve got a lot to learn, especially if I want the knowledge I lust for. They have shown my plenty of times of what to do, but my own issues tend to get in the way, it sucks. That’s a huge goal with me, getting Demons to help with my issues and lead me the right way.
Well that’s all I can think of for now.
I’d like to apologize to Satan, Lucifer, King Paimon, 1, 2 (Vuh), 3, 4, 5, 6 (Mynm), 7(Lamb), 8(Magnus), and 9 (The demons I have around me, numbered in accordance to who I found out about in order.), Raziel, and the others whom I do not know the names of, in a formal way, I want to do my best to make amends to all of them. How would I do so? I’m poor so I can’t really buy anything and I feel like they deserve a proper apology.
Also Asmodeus has kept popping in my mind for some reason for the past week or so, never read anything on him but keep feeling like I should know more about him. Who is he?
Anyways thank you for your time and any advice, help, or insight you may be able to give. And sorry for the ramblings.