After reading a scintillating discussion on morals, ethics, and their illusory potential, I wondered again about this strange evolution we humans undergo. Good/bad, right/wrong, subjective/objective. Of course, as a Christian (and yes, I preface with that because its rather uncommon on this particular forum), my understanding of source is rather the way the Doxology states:
“Praise God from whom all blessings flow”
So, what then, constitutes a blessing? And what constitutes a curse? And in our modern contract with the divine, do we understand Heavenly Father (Source; concept from Kybalion) to be also source of cursings, or would that kind of energy be reserved for the more specialized entities?
Of course, I use witchcraft to both curse and bless as my vessel, weak though she be, requires a great quantity of comfort; pain avoidance as a part of this stage in her evolution.
I was contemplating forgiveness and the colossal amount of time and energy required for this endeavor in this lifetime. Purveyor of an ongoing pact to create a life I love, it became apparent during this fantastic voyage upon the seas of commercialized so-called “living,” that without the capacity to extend grace; that is to forgive, I could not, in effect, fulfill my acts within the contract. And this lead to the most extraordinary discovery: demons hold one to the terms of the pact/contract/law/relationship. And as my relationship parameters are at all costs, then obtaining this quality, that of extending grace/mercy/forgiveness would also be mandated. By demons.
Which leads me back, of course, to the ultimate Law/Order – Heavenly Father. Commercial law derives from natural law, derives from divine law.
Actus legitimi non recipiunt modum. Acts of law admit of no qualification. This means that once a pact/relationship/law is in effect, then by contractual obligation none of the acts that are required to fulfill the contract may be changed/modified/qualified. In any way. So, I want a life I love, I must learn what love is, how to love, the foundation for love. And because a contract changes/is modified/is living only with the finite, the limited, it reflects an evolution on a small scale of the human psyche that initiated it. Creating the sigil of Vine to tear down and destroy that which held me back was an experience in its self.
Sigils seem to be a convergence in time/space where the human mind touches a vastly greater power, aligns with it, and the relationship merges for that time to set future contractual obligations. I prefer my contracts, to be paid in full immediately with blood energy and to leave the promissory end to the demonic for two reasons; one – I have far shorter sight, two – I have far less power, and by Divine Law: In the presence of the greater power, the lesser power ceases. I’d rather my power be subsumed and carried forward with greater alacrity that I am capable in this flawed and finite vessel full of misconceptions and twisted perception. So, in building the work subsequent to my sigil creation, I was shocked (in a detached observant way) to discover that the lacquered ornately decorated and painted piece with 1 Corinthians 13 was to be the layout backing for my sigil …of Vine?! I had assumed that the sigil would stand alone as many of my others have. Rather, this gateway was affixed to these words sealed in my blood:
13 If I speak in the tongues[a] of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. 3 If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.
4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
8 Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. 9 For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10 but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. 11 When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. 12 For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.
13 And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.
And for quite some time, I couldn’t fathom why, and chose not to inquire as Vine is an entity whose destructive side I have experienced in full. But, then when my husband asked ‘Why Vine?’ on that particular piece, I did wonder if I should bring it to my consciousness. So, I used my preferred chemical substances to buffer and facilitate the communication, and the answer was immediate. And I suppose, obvious, though I didn’t see it until that moment.
“This is the foundation required.” And I comprehended.
Divine Law:
Debile fundamentum, fallit opus. Where there is a weak foundation, the work falls.
Sublato fundamento cadit opus. Remove the foundation, the structure or work fall.
The absolute strongest foundation, then for my life must be love as comprehended by this vessel under this particular record in memoriam (1 Corinthians 13) of my pact with Heavenly Father (Law/Order) through His Son (Grace/Mercy/Forgiveness), and in the Holy Spirit (Sanctified Creativity/Chaos). Amusing to me that the way for this vessel to comprehend a living agreement/relationship is by reviewing a dead record on parchment, or rather in my case, digital form. But, nonetheless, this is utterly the only way to proceed. And this leaves a bitter taste. That of wormwood, the entity I used for this trace was quite appropriate. So, off I went to figure out how to forgive. Its one thing to curse another human vessel after putting myself in that person’s place. To enter their cognitive process and understand why, OH WHY, that person hurt me and continues to hurt me with deliberation and malice. When standing in that person’s place, it is completely comprehensible how with their limited paradigm, they would treat me in a manner I find totally inexcusable and reprehensible. If I was them (and I was for that period) I would do the same. Because, for those moments causing pain removed attention from their own pain. It twisted their confusion and self-love onto another; I observed the destroyed corrupted form of attention (and attention is love) paid me through a filter of unbearably agonizing pain.
And knowing that person, is nothing more nor less than a vessel loved as equally as mine by Heavenly Father and containing a spirit as pure and powerful as mine, though buried in its vessel. A spirit so lost that it could not realize its self as separate from the vessel. Yet. And unless I forgave and aligned my vessel with that of Heavenly Fathers and obeyed the command to “Love my neighbor as myself, “ I could do nothing. And that was impossible without accepting once more Christ’s influence; Grace/Mercy/Forgiveness of my own vessel’s sins/mistakes/finite nature. Of course, dragging this vessel back to the Christ when she really wants to see another vessel burn, bleed, and die horribly is an equally agonizing task…and a bit frustrating, because my vessel has a fairly stubborn, self-righteous, know-it-all streak. Using my god-tongue, we invoked and evoked Belial, Lilith, and Sonnelion to create conduits for the rage/despair, malice, and hate, and used liberal amounts of menstrual blood in the rituals. After sealing the conduits and consecrating the astral spaces, my vessel had a way to immediately drop into trance and release those thoughts/hormones/emotions rather than allowing them to further corrupt the vessel its self; after all, malice is deadly poison to a human vessel, really throws off the hormone balance, and once histamine levels start going haywire, well…biology is a hierarchy, so everything downstream is affected and for the worse.
Amusingly, this Gwendolyn vessel had absorbed so much offense that she actually was willing to allow herself to degenerate further rather than release the spite; she actually didn’t want to extend any forgiveness because it might make life easier for the other vessel. Illogical, short-sighted, corrupt ‘thinking’ and no fucking way was I going to allow that. So, after the evocation using menstrual blood, we took her athame and sliced her right palm adding blood replete with stress/aggression hormones, and in the immediate surge of adrenaline, endorphins, etc. I commanded the direction of the ritual with our god-tongue. I directed the demons to torment our adversarial vessel as they saw fit, thanked them, blessed our adversarial vessel with strength to endure and experience grace extended from Gwendolyn’s vessel. In nomini Patre, per Filium, et Spiritu Sancti. In the name of the Father, through the Son, by the Holy Spirit. And it was a spectacularly lovely meeting of minds. Many minds. And for those instances, One Mind. A relationship.
And a little more of the damage sustained by my vessel was healed. The next interaction with our (now) quasi-adversary, provoked nothing other than sorrow on the part of Gwendolyn. There was no vicious desire to hurt the person trying to hurt her; she merely sobbed, and I prayed in our god-tongue; we experienced the words in the spirit of terrible pain that they were written, but they were not taken into my vessel. Any potential for the surge of negative emotions was gone at inception, encapsulated and removed. And my vessel clothed herself with a courteous and neutral demeanor, calm and desiring nothing more than to do what it took at all costs to help our quasi-adversary heal. I am quite pleased. This is one of the last acts in an incredibly long series of rituals, layered pacts, and fabulous/terrifying chemical experiences to tear out an old abominable life by the rotting decayed roots to build another with a firm pure foundation.
And the most interesting thing is that it becomes even easier for my vessel to manifest the fruits of the spirit; praying daily with our god-tongue helps. The Bible is an interesting bit of recorded symbolic literature. At first glance, it would seem that ‘speaking in tongues (glossa)’ as a ‘gift of the Holy Spirit,’ is only used for communication with Heavenly Father. But, there are so many other uses to which it can be put, from physically healing my vessel, to commanding demons, to massive emotional/hormonal release/rebalance. So, as in Galatians; to have a life I love, means a hell of a lot more love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, and self-control. With a shit ton of perseverance (and relaxing chemical substances), because being mortal is no fucking picnic. And for that, I praise God.