No, I am not drunk, just bear with me.
Every so often after intense rites and the like I find myself unable to close my hands because I get this mental image that I am about to squeeze an eye that’s in my palm, and the same happens with my feet.
I know it’s all in my head, that it is not “real”.
The problem is a feeling of tingling, pulsation in those areas and the obssesive thought, visualized thought that pops about like that, lingering sometimes for days but in short episodes.
It is bothersome, I want to do push ups and punch my bag but as soon as I try all what I mentioned happens. Funnily enough I can sit in front of a PC for hours, handing the mouse with no incidence, but as soon as I ball my hands into a fist? Shitshow begins before I get to clinch my hands.
Any ideas? Has it happened to you?
If you need some more clarification, have you ever had a wound in a place you could not see or easily reach? I once fell on a cactus and while it was not as bad as it seems, I’d get queasy when pulling my shirt off and think of how grisly it must look. Happens the same with the “eye-in-palm” thingie, the difference is that I obviously never had a f*cking eyeball in those places!
If you are curious wgat I was doing occultist-wise to suddenly go through this, and that is the kicker, I have done nothing extreme or unique, other than sit down to reach Theta-Gamma and daydream about what I want done, no summoning or external influence. Been doing it on several bots throughout the day, about 12 - 20 times in total, counting the hour or so done before sleep.