Are you Manly Man (or Lesbian) that just had a long day of eating your wife’s lifelong friends pussy and kicking ass and now you just wanna go home to relax but remember you have a Moody wife or GF that is always a sadsack?
Is Her pasta never good enough for you? Does it lack that CHA-KOW the MILF down the street has?
Does she keep cooking the steak Medium Rare even though you told her WELL DONE and the Blessings of the Twin Gods Right Hand and Left Hand upon her face did nothing at all to solve the problem except get you a restraining order?
Are you tired of seeing a Large pickle on her bed and finally connecting the dots of why she constantly screams PICKLE RRRIIIIIICCCCCCKKKKKK at random times?
We’ll look no further cause…well…there’s no further to look and you would be a dumbass to try.
Here is a Ritual for you, you Manly Man’s Man or Lesbian:
Set a Red Candle to represent your Manly (or Lesbian) Self. Feel it charged with all the testosterone and feel the sperm in your nutsack wiggling with power.
Set a Blue candle behind you and see your wifes sadness in it. See all her bitching and moaning in it.
Vibrate this ancient word of power/ Incantation as well:
SHUT THE FUCK UP ALREADY (9x)
Feel the whining start to quiet down and her hormones start to balance.
Turn to the Blue candle and repeat:
CAN I GET SOME PEACE AND QUIET ALREADY!!(9x)
Then pick up the blue candle and smash it against the wall, seeing your old wife gone and your new wife rise from the Depths of The Void.
Side Effects of the Rite
• Broken Glass
• Powerful Demons in Blue Uniform with Badges. At this point of the Theta Gamma Sync, you will hear what’s sounds like voices saying, “Come out with your hands up!!”
Do not let seeds of fear be planted in your heart and do not leave the circle.
• Your Wife may manifest physically yelling Words of Power in your face. These normally consist of
“Get out my house!”
And more words that no human mind can comprehend.
P.S.: I have one for the Ladies as well