Other than creating a few relaxing places and meeting my unborn baby in the astral, I really have very little conscious experience there. So I took some wonderful advice and decided to meet a nice power/spirit animal in the lower world to help me out a bit.
Once again, I over thought it and missed a crucial detail. I seem to learn best by fixing my fiascos. After reading loads of articles and books and theories, I figured I was ready. It seemed pretty straightforward.
Put in earbuds, enter trance, state intention, find familiar earth entrance to lower world, meet power animal. Should I have written the steps down first? Yep. Did I? Nope.
So, I arrived easily at a place I know next to a beautiful little creek with all these gnarly tree roots that curve around and over each other making lots of holes and tunnels. I looked around for a nice entrance while concentrating on meeting my power animal. And after a while a mallard fades/waddles in.
Its odd trying to explain a trance in words. This is like describing a painting or song. Not quite right. Anywho, he got …annoyed/forceful and told me to back off from trying to control his appearance and name (his name faded in, too.) Somehow, it didn’t click that um…I’d never actually ENTERED THE DAMNED EARTH. Anyways, I was pretty happy, thanked him and left. Figured I could have adventures the next night, since having a fussy baby interrupt a trance is uncomfortable.
So, the next night, my fussy baby fussed a lot and it wasn’t until 4am that I had another chance to go back. In the meantime I read everything I found on mallard symbolism and there was nothing on power animals with names. At least I’m keeping a journal of the bizarreness.
Entering the trance again in the wee hours of the morning, I was delighted to find my mallard after hopping up a lot of tree branches in female mallard form. I wanted to know why the hell he had a name. Earlier, I’d been thinking about meeting a family member in the upper world, but I wanted to get to know the mallard first. Guess I didn’t put that other idea out of my head clearly enough. And I hadn’t yet realized that I’d never entered the lower world last time, but still, why didn’t I reread the instructions before attempting this again? ugh
So, I was stupidly hopping toward the upper area of my world tree when he showed up. I really hate being a beginner at stuff. We flew over to a gray formless place and there was my human self trying to comfort my son trapped in a black iron cage rather like a net covered with outward-facing spikes. A series of chains connected the net/cage to a spike sticking through my heart. Every time I tried to hold the little child, I got stabbed. Over and over. I watched this from my female mallard form.
Cleverly using his beak to snap the bars, the mallard freed him and the child faded away. We ducks next examine human me standing there inert. Iron barbed spikes are poking through my forehead, throat, heart, and three lower in my torso. One more is on top of my head with the barbs poking into my crown. They are fastened to a thick iron bar running up my spine supporting me. We pulled the barbed spikes out of the iron bar and human me, starting with the heart spike and heavy chains. Human me began leaking light/blood from each gaping hole and flopping over. The mallard stuck his beak into the holes one at a time and pulled out a ball of light and repaired it, then reinserted. Human me stood strong and faded, too. Grabbing the iron bar in his beak, the mallard briefly faded humanish, turned the bar gold, informed me that it was his spear, re-mallard-ized, and flew off with it in his beak. Kinda makes sense since his name meant spear warrior, but WHAT THE FUCK?! This is exactly what I get for ignorantly fucking around and not following instructions.
Today, I wrote the instructions down and I’ll go through a mental run a few times before starting over with the whole power animal idea. Good grief. Or should I bag that and go with the spear warrior mallard? I’ve always had a very hard time with step by step directions, so I probably need to develop that first. This is beyond weird, although its convenient that I can remember it so vividly.