So, I am a very not disciplined practitioner. I am proficient at sigil work, and I’ve only ever worked with my ancestors and a special Loa as far as spirit work. I consider myself an arm chair magician in that realm.
Anyhoo, the last month or two I haven’t been able to get Raphael and Azazel off my mind. I decided to evoke Raphael first. My dad is in bad health. So the last week or so I’ve been meditating on Raphael, especially while falling asleep. I also ordered a beautiful green quartz pendant with his sigil engraved on it.
I prepared and went about my meditation. I stared at his sigil I had drawn large on a piece of paper. I didn’t get the flashing, but it did begin to kinda move and look 3D. Then I began chanting his name like RAH-FAY-EL, rythmically. I could feel myself in a good state, so I began speaking to him respectfully. I began with thanks, then asked for his help directly, or to help me help my dad, or help my sister help him, so that he can be comfortable and in sound mind for his last years.
At some point I stopped talking and continued my breathing. It was like I felt something lifting my chin, and lifting and lifting and pushing my head backwards. My head kept lifting and moving back until it was fully hanging backwards, and it was like something pulled up and out from the center of my chest. It was almost like a half backbend. And my body felt weightless and numb followed by tingles. I breathed that way for a little while. When the weightless feeling subsided, I slowly brought myself back up to a normal sitting position. I went back to breathing again, and said his name again and asked if I had his permission to allow my dad to wear the pendant. I got flooded with an awesome loving feeling. I don’t cry, and it actually made me cry. I don’t feel loving feelings very often unfortunately.
I took my tears and made a cross on the back of the pendant. Then took some more and made a fingerprint on the paper where I drew the sigil. I didn’t burn it. I put it under my pillow. I have parrots so if I do burn it then it will have to be later away from them.
The center of my chest is sore and funny feeling a little. My neck and back feel great.
I’ve always been very tactile … but not tactile like that. I was really hoping for words to enter my mind. I tried asking a question but got nothing. I’m hoping my senses will improve as I continue to practice. Very interesting . Not what I was expecting.
I’ve been studying a lot about Raphael. He’s a unique one. Some people who work with him seem to believe he’s not Christian. Apparently he said that throughout time he’s been known by many names. Maybe once I hone my senses better I’ll ask.
I don’t really ever foresee me evoking many others. Especially Michael. I feel like we would not get along. We’re both too headstrong and I’m very knowledge driven and adversarial whereas Michael is very eh… strictly demanding of the surrender and follow model.
Everyone loves working with Raphael though from everything I’ve read, Christians, hippies with crystals, wiccans, all cm’s, and people who primarily work with the Goetia. Raphael’s personality must be pretty chill and awesome is what I gathered.
I’ll leave the Christian thing. I’m pretty ignorant on that subject soooo…
I remembered something else and made a few other observations about my experience.
When I was bent backwards, it felt very similar to a strong camel pose from ashtanga yoga, except my legs were crossed. When you do that pose most people brace theirself with their palms on their calves behind them. The pose stimulates the Vegas nerve… A huge nerve that runs through the center of the body. In yoga everyone is always very careful of this pose because the nerve stimulation is pretty intense. If someone goes into the pose too deep too quick they will get very light headed, get a headache or get nauseaus. I didn’t feel any of that.
When I was practicing Ashtanga regularly years ago, I only went through primary series so successfully that I got the weightless feeling once. It’s when you really syncronitizing your breath and get into the right meditative state moving through the posture sequence. You will feel weightless and like you are floating from one posture to the next. If anyone has experienced that in yoga, that’s what the weightlessness felt like during the evocation contortion. To someone watching I imagine it would have looked painful, but to someone familiar with yoga they would say wow she went right into camel posture… And for me my observation after is, wow I went right into that advanced meditative state. Like I said I only ever achieved that during ashtanga primary once. Also I forgot this part but after breathing there in that posture for a bit, after I felt the pulling up and out from my chest… that could have been compared to a yoga teacher assisting your posture and placing their hand between your shoulder blades and pushing your arch up further… except I felt the pulling from the front between my boobs kinda instead of pushing from the back. After that, it was like someone had their hands on my shoulders and started alternating shaking them gently. Like a gentle shoulder shimmy.
Now THAT as far as I know anyway, is definitely not something a yoga teacher would recommend or do in that posture. I’m not really sure what was up with that. And after the shoulder bit that was when the weightlessness wore off and I carefully pulled myself back up.
Today I still have a sore spot in my chest between my boobs and around my heart but that’s it, and is the normal to be expected next day from that stretch, except the repercussions, especially with me being so tight and out of shape right now, would usually actually be more.
Just random observations as of thinking this morning.
If you do make sure you have pen and paper handy to write. Most people get auditory, visual or emotional messages it seems like. I really wasn’t expecting something tactile, but like I said I’ve been very tactile in the past with other workings and divination so I guess it wasn’t too bizarre.
Has anyone noticed out of character emotional instability?
I’m a very mellow person and I have a lot of emotional stability typically. I completely lost my shit this evening in traffic. I mean I was screaming at the top of my lungs and scared my boyfriend. He said I sounded possessed and I needed to pull over and he’d come get me. It was bad. I never snap like that.
I’m not sure if the energy shakeup last night may have made me a little unstable, or if I’m just standard depressed or emotional because of my dad’s old age/health.
One way or the other I need to do some mind clearing and grounding of some kind. It doesn’t matter one way or the other, just curious.
A good link; thanks. Indeed, JCI by the hands of many magicians and grimoires -probably due to the fear of inquisition or similar threats – in order to keep things within “legal or acceptable” boundaries, they have fed JCI into magick and basically to all of its elements and still that saga endures.
IMO, I prefer the pure thoughts – if ever I am lucky enough to reach them- in one hand; but for practical purposes while keeping some religion based text or words (whether they’re based on Kabbalah or any other religion- Islam, Jawa, Hindu etc ) indeed that shouldn’t be maybe but they also prove to be useful even mostly I think that the lien is mostly inorganic (or invented).
When I think the reasons about their effectiveness; I mean the source of their powers, whether it has its origins within my subconscious or came from an exogenous source like eggregors that are attached to these words or alphabets or both at the same time; or do they just trigger the force invested and left behind by our ancestors; I am not sure.
Apart the usefulness of some texts as I said, in belief level purely original ideas about daemons, gods, and Angels ; the ones that precedes religion seem more meaningful to me.