So I’ve been exploring and experimenting with different paths and deities, and I’ve found myself often resistant to delving too deeply into any one practice, even though I’ve noticed physical world effects with certain follow through.
I guess my question is: can someone come across the perfect magickal path for them- and still feel the need to “apply themselves” to the regular practice of ritual- like learning a new skill?
I have this belief that says the “most magickal path” or the clearest communication from your soul- is always the path of least resistance.
So I guess I’m torn between this “path of least resistance” that meanders around different deities and practices AND a forced “new habit” that may or may not feel entirely as comfortable in performing as say a highly compatible possession or invocation does.
It’s kinda that same problem I had with my Creative Writing professor:
THEY say “WRITE everyday, even if your not inspired.”
I say “How can I know what to write or why I’m writing it if I’m NOT inspired!?!!?”
And magick sometimes feels like that, where it’s “All or Nothing” where I’m “pulling the universe into new and proper alignment” or acting just performing empty actions to “remember the motions”
Seems like, in some magick: The Form dictates the Content.
In which case any “rehearsal” of the Content seems meaningless as it’s “unplugged” energetically/ emotionally speaking from the ritual’s Intent/ Purpose.
However, waiting-for-the-right-moment, feels somewhat neglectful of my Magickal life/ skills/ ability/ potential.
So, though I don’t like the total lack of structure and gravitas of Chaos Magick- I haven’t yet felt the pull or call into a particular habit of practice.
Is this common? Does it sound like more of a mundane problem?
or is there a very real subtle discretion that must be discovered whereby Magician must “build their shelter in the rain” instead of tuning to a better weather forecast?
Can a Magician have contradictory forces pulling him toward different action and behavior- like two people talking to you at once at a dinner party?
Should I “plow through” the subtle emotional cues of my daily life and just resolve to meditate- at a certain time each day whether I feel like it or not?
Cause your intuition is supposed to be subtle… But so is the voice of Magick, but so are old habits and slowly obsolescing beliefs.