Demons or Me?

So I’ve been on this forum for only a few months. As everyone who comes to the occult seeking knowledge and power and to tear down the walls of old paradigms I too sought these things for whatever gain I could get.

I tried baneful magick which didn’t work but I lay that down to my inexperience and as such I’m still increasing my knowledge on all forms of magick.
To say whether or not my evocations were successful idk. I contacted Belial, Lucifer, Asmodeus as the big boys in the infernal for helping me with my addictions and to fortify my temple (mind, body) - Belial, increasing my knowledge through enlightenment (mind, spirit) - Lucifer, and giving me the inner fire to go after my dreams in terms of the physical gain (willpower) - Asmodeus.
I contacted Bune and Clauneck as well for helping me increase monetary gain and knowledge to do so.

I introduced myself to all 9 Demonic Kings and offered them blood as well as Lilith.
The manifestations of my evocations were not spectacular or flashy or anything of the sort and I haven’t done any for at least 2 months.
I dropped magick in terms of evocations for a while to establish myself and the path that I want to take where spirit contact is concerned and sought after the power I can develop within myself and allowed for whatever I asked for to just take place and allow the magick to work and do its thing.

Since then I’ve kicked my alcohol and cannabis addiction at the same time resisting sexual desires and taking on semen retention. Now I would like to say its all me but my most recent workings would imply that what I asked for is taking place. When I changed my magick from the external to the internal development things started to change for me. I’m not as depressed as I was the past year and let go of outcomes and trying to control people and situations. This could all be just me and a consequence of me getting my shit together but apart of me feels as though the entities I’ve worked with had a part to play in it and are silently guiding me on my path. I can feel a power growing inside me as if I’m charging myself for something great. When my chrysalis finally breaks I will be reborn.

The journey is as important as the destination I can only continue to discover what this new world has in store for me and my becoming into my own living god.

Hail my Brothers n Sisters
This is only the beginning


If you’re going to continue this, you should turn it into a journal.


Yeah reclassify as a journal.:+1:


to be honest with you I have no idea how to change that right now. The editing function evades me